Wednesday, April 30, 2008 ❤
30th of April... Last day of April.. May is comin... Today is the day to get my pay... BOYFRIEND said de... Still got 8 days to our 2 month Anniversary... Really fast... As usual, we will not go and celebrate it because we are really busy people... BOYFRIEND has to work long hour and I have to study in the morning and afternoon and evening have to work...
Today force myself to wake up and went to school without havin any breakfast... Class was borin... If I never do anything, I might fell asleep... The faci, who took over the class today, is totally long-winded person... Talkin and talkin and talkin non-stop... My brain was like CAN HE JUS SHUT UP for a while..?? I am fallin asleep soon... His jokes will not FUNNY at all and I found it LAME..
Lookin forward after school for work... Because can see BOYFRIEND... Mmm... Really hate to comin to school... Thinkin about project really make me STRESS... Ya I need to rework my PP scope... ARGH... Not good enough... I feel like doin the scope related to business not media...
Anyway, I dunno who to interview if I am doin media... HELL... I AM SO STRESS... That why I hate to come to school and keep findin BOYFRIEND or either stay at home to rest will be better...
☠❤Dead Jas❤☠8:32 AM
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Back home... Wee~~ Jus now went out with BOYFRIEND... Mmm... Really enjoy the time with her... So in the morning at about 11 plus, went to Popular to buy a thick english book and took bus no. 105 to Ghim Moh, BOYFRIEND house...
Waited for her to wake up while readin the book for 1 hour plus... BOYFRIEND woke up 12 plus in the afternoon... Then went up to her house... Waited for BOYFRIEND to get ready... Until 2 plus, BOYFRIEND, her sister and me went to the nearby coffeeshop to eat lunch...
Then went up to her house again and BOYFRIEND and I went to Orchard for the movie... Yay... Watched 2 movies... I suggested... Hahazz.. Watched the "Hansel and Gretel" and "Forbidden Kingdom"...
Bought the movie tickets at Cathay then went to Taka to have a walk... On the way, we chatted about the chalet matter that will be organized on this comin July... Maybe we will be plannin to have our own world instead of callin other friends and disturb our romantic... Hahazz... Will see how it goes...
At about 5 plus, we went back to Cathay and Level 9 we bought our FAMILY COMBO Set... One packet of Popcorn and 2 drinks... "Hansel and Gretel" is not so SCARY but I jus love the storyline... Mostly it is describe that adults who treated the kids badly will be punished or die... And the kids also need LOVE from the adults... This movie really talk about my heart out... I do need LOVE from parents badly... I need their care and concern when I am in problem or I am really sad... I love the ending part too...
After movie, we took Bus no. 111 to BOYFRIEND house to get my bag.. Then next BOYFRIEND sent me down to take cab home because I seriously cannot walk too much as my leg got a very serious injuries... I said that I am willin to take bus home... But BOYFRIEND said that she wan me to take cab home... So she gave me a 10 dollar note and hire a cab for me to go home...
BOYFRIEND really so lovin to me... I LOVE HER more and more... Thank for concernin me and care for me when I am feelin down... Although we do not spend too much time on each other, hope that our love still can be strong and be FOREVER... Love you...
☠❤Dead Jas❤☠12:18 AM
Tuesday, April 29, 2008 ❤
29th of April... Did not wish to go to school... Jus dunno why... Yesterday BOYFRIEND did not come to my house... I am jus feelin that everytime she said she wan to come but in the end did not turn up at all... Haiz... Anyway, she got her reason that is WORK... Work is the most important... I will forgive her...
Now I am at the MacDonald at Jurong East Entertainment there... Waitin for BOYFRIEND to wake up for movie... BOYRFRIEND should be very tired... Mmm... Jus hope that she can faster wake up to watch movie with me...
I feelin so alone now... Plannin what to do later before BOYFRIEND woke up... Maybe I will go K Box to sing until 2pm... Then BOYFRIEND should wake up on that time... So sad that I cannot go to BOYFRIEND house because her house got people... So cannot be like last time always go to her house...
BOYFRIEND FASTER WAKE UP..!! I MISS YOU so much...
☠❤Dead Jas❤☠9:37 AM
Monday, April 28, 2008 ❤
Back to blog again... I jus feel a sudden of blank.. Dunno what to do like that... I think sooner or later my mother will know about the relationship between me and my BOYFRIEND... Because jus now in the evening, I told her that a FRIEND (BOYFRIEND) will be comin to my house to stay overnight... Then she like very shocked and asked "THAT TOMBOY??"...
Why did she have that type of expression...?? I jus dun understand... Can't I make friend with TOMBOY..?? I think in future TOMBOY please dun get near me... Because I can't be your friend due to my mother disallow me..
At night, my mother came into my room and suddenly asked me that I dun wan to give birth or get marry jus because of her... Why can't I have my own choice to love someone that I love the most..?? I really feel so stress under my mother control... Mother said that if I really do fall in love with her, that mean I got problem already..
I admitted that I already got problem... Why do I fall in love with a girl?? Do you all know the reason...?? I really had enough from the guys... Those guys who had stead with me are really not true heart at all... They jus simply wan my Body... They dun respect me at all... They are jus showin off on the street when they are with me... I hate them so much...
Another things that made me turn this way are the stresses from the surrounding people... Friends betray me which made me lost confidence and almost leadin to killin myself, stresses from homeworks, being dumped by my ex boyfriends before which made me cry out the heart out, being control by my mother in she kept wanting to know what I have done outside and also who are my friends and my friends' background..
I also cannot stand that in the past, my mother always compare me to her friend's daughter (Acted in one of the Jack Neo's movie, named as Selina in that movie) who is very well-behaved, always get good grade for exam and also a popular actress in the TV media... Actually, she really did not know that the girl was quite bad at outside... She always went to the basketball court there and mix with the bad company... Somemore, that person was VERY PROUD like hell...
Whatever... Who shall I blame when I have become like that..?? Everytime I always cry for help in my heart, nobody is willing to come and help me to share the problem... I always show my parents anger because I not in good mood and I am really stress and in trouble... And yet my parents said that dun show my anger to them... And yet never ask me what really had happen to me...?? Is this what they say parent love...?? I dun feel any love from them...
This is why I need a blog... I need it badly... I used blog to say out all the things I am unhappy of.. I can say that I havin difficulties to communicate with my present classmates... I jus dunno why... I often feel so left out... Nobody really came forward to give me courage... Only some facilitators come forward to give me courage... I really should thank them lot lot...
Now I am tryin really hard to be strong on myself and I really dun need anyone to help me... I will solve all the problem by myself... I will prefer to cry inside my heart... I dun need any care from the surrounding..
☠❤Dead Jas❤☠9:18 PM
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28th of April... Back to school again.. Tryin hard enough to squeeze out all my brain juice to think of the ideas for my team... I really need about 10 minutes to think out one idea... I am damn SLOW... Anyway, I can say that I HATE SCHOOL...
Waitin time to past faster... I wan to go back home and rest... After school, I always very very TIRED... Mmm... Quite happy because BOYFRIEND is comin to my house tonight to stay one night with me... And we also will plan to drink in my house... Wee~~
LONG time never drink... Tomorrow shall be not goin to school... Might be goin out with BOYFRIEND for a movie at Orchard or Vivo City... Still not really confirm... Jus that I noe that tomorrow the whole day BOYFRIEND will be with me... Yay.. BOYFRIEND tomorrow OFF..
☠❤Dead Jas❤☠10:45 AM
Sunday, April 27, 2008 ❤
27th of April... Now talkin on the phone with BOYFRIEND... Mmm... Today work not so bad... Today after work suppose wan to meet BOYFRIEND for movie and came my house to stay but in the end, it did not success.. Because the movie started at 12am and not enough time for me to reach Orchard...
Haiz... Must wait until tomorrow... Because I goin to BOYFRIEND's home in the morning.. Yay... Hahazz... VERY GOOD... Long time never go BOYFRIEND's house... MISS BOYFRIEND...
Think I have nothin to write because I dunno what to say... GOOD NIGHT PEOPLE who reading my blog... Sweet dream...
☠❤Dead Jas❤☠12:39 AM
Saturday, April 26, 2008 ❤
It is already 1.30am... Today finally can see BOYFRIEND.. So happy... Anyway, I pon school today.. So went to meet Gan Mei at the entrance during 2nd break then together we went to W4 to find other friends...
Next we went to FOOD HEAVEN for some drinks and chit chat about our life now.. Then at 12pm plus we went back to W4 Level 5... Went to my brother classroom... And yet my brother still not there yet.. Dunno where he had gone or he never come to school today... BAD BOY...
It was about 1 plus... No time to go Orchard for K box... Damn sianz but never mind... We went to Causeway Point for some walk... We went to Popular to buy my notebooks and a pen for my study of the project... Then next went up and thought of watchin movie... But there was no nice movie to watch, so went down to Basement for some dinner...
Ate until 2 plus... Damn still early... So I sent Gan Mei to take train and I took bus no. 925 to Choa Chu Kang... The journey is damn LONG.. I fell asleep most of the time... Until it reached the station then I quickly woke up and drop off from the bus...
After that, went to Level 3 food court to find BOYFRIEND... Next we went to POLAR... BOYFRIEND break finish.. So BOYFRIEND treat me damn close and good right in front of other staffs... Hahazz... We are not suppose to let them know our relationship or else we sure kena separated by the company... Or get FIRE...
Went to buy some coffee and green tea... And went back again to get my laptop to do my homework at Basement the FOOD JUNCTION... Went online and download all the files... Done my RJ and evaluation... Then went to my blogspot and WRETCH to see any update messages...
At about 5 plus, went back to the outlet to get my uniform and put back my laptop... And went to toilet to get change... And went back to get start of the work.. WORK was OK... Sale was quite OK only..
BOYFRIEND stayed until Closing and damn sianz is that we had to stay until 11 plus because of th cleanin.. ARGH... BOYFRIEND accompany me back home... Got home late reached home about 12 plus... MISS BOYFRIEND so much because she will be workin different shift with me... BOYFRIEND I LOVE YOU...
☠❤Dead Jas❤☠1:30 AM
Friday, April 25, 2008 ❤
25th of April... Think through what I have done in the past... I think my attitude is too bad that I cannot stand it... This attitude made me wan to give up everything in my life... I jus like wan to be a monk or jus die... But I know I cannot do this... Because I cannot leave my BOYFRIEND alone...
Yesterday suppose to meet BOYFRIEND after her work.. But in the end, BOYFRIEND did not go to work because she MC... I watched the movie alone... Watched that "FORBIDDEN KINGDOM"... Really a nice story with a mix of Chinese and English...
I suddenly feel that Liu Yi Fei so pretty... And she is jus 2 years older than me... Can't believe that... I thought she already like 25 years old... But she is younger than that... About 21 year old this year.. She is jus like a person that came from the heaven... O my...
Mmm... After my movie, went straight home... Really sad did not have the chance to meet BOYFRIEND... But keep sms-ing with BOYFRIEND on the way back home..
BOYFRIEND get well soon... Lookin forward for tomorrow night.. Datin with BOYFRIEND for a midnight movie and also comin my home to sleep one night... LOVE IT!!
☠❤Dead Jas❤☠8:26 AM
Thursday, April 24, 2008 ❤
24th of April.... Back to school again... Feelin like so noob in the class... Haiz... Today will be a LONG day stayin in school... Because stayin back school for my PP workshop to get to know more the project in Year 3...
Maybe thinkin of waitin BOYFRIEND to finish her work... Watch one movie then meet BOYFRIEND...
Yesterday really had a great time with BOYFRIEND after work... Us usual we went to the playgarden which is near my house there to chit chat... I love to stay at BOYFRIEND's side.. Love her huggin.. Hope that I can stay by her side FOREVER without leavin her alone... BOYFRIEND is always LOVE by me... Wee~~
☠❤Dead Jas❤☠8:38 AM
Wednesday, April 23, 2008 ❤
23rd of April... I am no more sad again... All problems being settled once again.. Anyway, must thank for BOYFRIEND willin to accompany me for the whole night...
I am back to happy again.. Today never go to school because of some reasons.. Firstly, I wan to have more time with BOYFRIEND and also I am lazy to go to school today... BOYFRIEND went home first during work.. And I have to work until closing...
BOYFRIEND suppose need to meet me at Jurong East station but in the end late, so she told me that she will meet me at my house there... I took bus alone back home and met BOYFRIEND at my house bus stop... Together we walked to my house...
BOYFRIEND did not mad at me anymore... This is what I am happy about... Went straight to my room because I never inform anyone in my family that she will be comin.. Went for bath when I switch on my laptop... BOYFRIEND watched that 刺青 movie...
After that, then we slept on the same bed until the next morning... BOYFRIEND gave me a NEW ring... This time this ring represented that I am willin to marry to her... Really LOVE the ring so much and also the cute little ring casing... About 9 plus.. Really miss BOYFRIEND and dun feel like let her go back... We woke up and I ate some food and BOYFRIEND did not wan to eat anything at all...
This is the NEW ring from my Dearest Lao Gong..
☠❤Dead Jas❤☠12:55 PM
Tuesday, April 22, 2008 ❤
I think I really cannot stand the stress anymore... I totally break down... I had been SMS-ing BOYFRIEND since midnight till now... I dun really know what to do so that she can trust me back again and forget the anger that I gave her in the work... I jus dun wan that our relationship end... What I have promised her that I will be her forever wife..
During the journey to school.., I have been telling myself not to cry and I must control... But in the end, I still can't be success and I cry right in front of the class... I am such a failure... I really kinda of no face at all... I still dunno wan to pon or not... Because I still cannot manage my stress too well...
I dun wish to talk much today... The more I talk the more I feel like cryin... That why I keep quiet in class... I dun wish to speak up anything at all...
I really hope that BOYFRIEND can dun mad at me in work anymore... I am very very very SORRY... Please dun heck care me because BOYFRIEND is the only one who can really give me support and give me HAPPY...
☠❤Dead Jas❤☠9:42 AM
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What is happiness..??
What is Trust??
What is Friendship??
What is Love??
Is there trust between friends??
Is there always happiness in life??
Why is there betray in friendship??
Why trust cannot being found easily in friendship??
I AM VERY TIRED of my life... I really hate to being a STRONG girl... Being a strong girl so what... In the end, also kena being betray by friends and also treat like a puppet to being fool around and laugh at...
I have being told myself since Primary school till now that I must be a STRONG girl so that people will not look down on me... But in the end, people still look down on me... I jus like a fool... I always being used by people.. And I never realised that they had gained some benefits from me...
What for being a STRONG girl... When kena bully, I cry alone when no one is around... I have to cheer myself up without any friends around... I think I cry in front of people.. People also dun even come and bother me...
I am tired to put on a happy mask on my face... I jus dun wan to force myself too much... The more I force myself the more I get HURT from others...
Today did quarrelled with BOYFRIEND because of work... BOYFRIEND still in anger... No matter I talk what she will not care to reply... I think she need sometime to cool down...
She and I got angry because of other staffs' matters... I got angry because I really cannot take it when she treated one of the aunties too good... I jus feel that I not her girlfriend like that.. That why I am jealous... That aunty always so close to her and stick with her like her girlfriend... I really cannot take it that why I got angry... She seldom treat me like that before...
The problem that she got angry I will not mention here... If you wan to know what really had happened to her, I think is better to talk with me through MSN messager... Because when I talked about this, I can get really really angry.. So if people wish to know, better get PREPARE to cool me down...
BOYFRIEND I am damn sorry to show my anger to you... I jus dun wan to break with you so easily... Can give me one more CHANCE..?? I promise you that whatever you wish me to do, I will do for you... Including not to have contact with other guys I will fulfill you.. Because you are my only one and Last LAO GONG or BOYFRIEND...
☠❤Dead Jas❤☠12:17 AM
Monday, April 21, 2008 ❤
21st of April... I AM GETTIN MORE TIRED AND STRESSFUL IN SCHOOL... I regret of choosin to continue to study... Really had ENOUGH... I jus hope that I can have a LONG break... Study really give me too much of stress...
I jus hope that I can drop out of the school now... I dun wan to study... I HATE to talk... PRESENTATION is the most I hate it... Whatever... The more I talk the more anger I will... FUCK!!
Ok... Yesterday work not good.. Too much pastries left over... BOYFRIEND was very angry with the person who ordered the pastries... Yesterday I also did made my BOYFRIEND angry... I also got angry by her because she scold me right in front of all the people.. I dropped my tear duing work... Nobody really did come and cheer me up.. Only one of the aunties that very close to me say something that made me forget my anger...
But after work, my anger was disappear... So I did try my best to cheer BOYFRIEND up... Wah.. It took me more than 30 minutes to make her happy... I saw she cried in the MRT.. So I gave her tissue paper and she said she not crying... Hahazz... So I did not GIVE UP and continue to cheer her up....
BOYFRIEND sent me to my house there... We walked up to my house and went down to the playground near my house for some talks.. I lied my head on BOYFRIEND's leg there... Felt so comfortable.. And also talked a lot about life, work and other...
Hugged BOYFRIEND and went back 12am.. Asked BOYFRIEND to come my house to sleep but she said she really dun like to see my mother... And she also said that wait until Tuesday night she will come my house to sleep.. I jus cannot wait until Tuesday night.. I finally can have more time to talk with her and sleep with her like Husband and Wife...
MISS BOYFRIEND too much... I LOVE HER FOREVER..
☠❤Dead Jas❤☠10:25 AM
Saturday, April 19, 2008 ❤
19th of April.. I think I have to admit that I am a VERY EMO person... Because I always dun like to talk to people around me and I dun like to smile either... Those smiles that appear from my face I can say that those are fake and devil smiles...
I now then know that I am not a good person because I always think from revenging... After makin people feel bad, my heart will be so happy... I also dunno why did I have this type of devil emotion... I dunno who can change me back...
Now in school, I dun like to talk more things to my friends... Because I jus think that I cannot really communicate with them... Maybe they had know that I am a LES.. That why they scared to get near me... OR I can't even produce a USEFUL idea in group discussion and they think that I am jus being LAZY... Actually, I am not a LAZY person jus that people had said out all my ideas and that why I had nothin to say... I really did use my brain to force myself to think as much as I can but in the end, I really very DISAPPOINTED about myself...
I am the one who always being left behind... People seem like dun like to get near me... People even wan to go home or go to school with me... When I am alone walkin to school or walkin back to Woodland station, my brain was like keep thinkin why do people dun wan to walk with me... AM I A MONSTER to them..??
From my heart that tell me, people from surrounding are not really trustfully people... They can easily betray me.. Those who can be easily trusted are those who are willin help me in showin me some cares like my BOYFRIEND, some aunties in my workplace, my buddies in Poly, Jing Hong and Tim, and also will not forget my DEAREST godsisters, Lee Ling and Yu Ting, and godbrother., Eric, that I knew from Secondary School till now...
I wan to thank you all that willin to care for me when I am damn sad... And also did said some encouraged thing to me when I am in problems... Those smiles that appear right in front of you all only are my REAL smiles and it does come right from my heart... I LOVE YOU ALL GUYs... I will not forget those happy time that we had in the past...
Today was a horrible day... Because BOYFRIEND never come for work and I stayed back to work 8am to 10.30pm... But I did had a great in my workin.. And I still miss my BOYFRIEND so much during work... Mmm... Work not bad hit 3K...
Worked until my legs cannot even walk or stand at all... I jus wan to sit down forever like that... Argh... Hate this type of pain... Dunno what will happen to my leg tomorrow... Tomorrow will be workin not so long hours.. Hee heezz... Hope BOYFRIEND can come for work.. I MISS HER so so much...
☠❤Dead Jas❤☠11:55 PM
Friday, April 18, 2008 ❤
18th of April... Yesterday had a little great time with BOYFRIEND after work... After school, went straight to work... In the evening to night, it is the busiest time... Heard from them that morning to afternoon was quite a little bad...
I only can say that working like a crazy or mad people... Did not talk to BOYFRIEND a single thing during work because I wan to concentrate in my work... BOYFRIEND thought I not happy with her.. Hahazz...
Mmm... After work, BOYFRIEND sent me home... Back as usual mood... But BOYFRIEND like not in the past attitude... Haiz... But is ok to me.. As long as she treat me as her wife, I will be HAPPY...
Talked to BOYFRIEND halfway, then her BEST FRIEND called her... Talked until very very LONG... Haiz spolit my speakin with BOYFRIEND... I jus wish that I can have more time to talk to my BOYFRIEND...
When we were at Jurong East station, we went to the SWEET TALK there... I suppose wan to buy a Bubbletea but close so talked to them a while as LONG TIME no see since the upgrade at LOT 1...
BOYFRIEND stood one side and kept talkin on phone... And I chatted with SWEET TALK staffs... After that, we went to take bus 334... Hee heezz... Got chance to hold BOYFRIEND's hand...
BOYFRIEND sent me to my house downstair 5th storey.. I jus can't let my BOYFRIEND go because I miss her too much... BOYFRIEND I LOVE YOU... ❤❤❤
☠❤Dead Jas❤☠9:09 AM
Thursday, April 17, 2008 ❤
17th of April.. Back to school... School was so stressful to me.. Jus feel like wan to drop out of school... I dun wan to be stress on my Final Year project in Year 3... I dun like to do project at all... Hate it..
Yesterday after school went for work... Work was damn busy like hell... No time to rest or drink water... Sales was not bad.. Almost hit 3k... Lolz... BOYFRIEND suppose worked until 9 plus but extended to closing... Not because of me is she wan to earn more money...
Now I really dunno what BOYFRIEND think... She like hack care me... Sometimes can treat me so good when she was not TIRED and when she damn tired, she showed me her bad attitude... That why I am really disappointed about this... I try to care for her as much as I can when she is tired... But she reject my concern..
BOYFRIEND I jus hope that she can understand what my heart think of her... And I dun wan to get rejected my conern when she is TIRED.. That all... I jus LOVE HER too much... The cost of LOVE is priceless...
☠❤Dead Jas❤☠9:47 AM
Wednesday, April 16, 2008 ❤
16th of April... Haiz... Today problem seem to be very EASY but the problem is that I not use with the program that we need to make the other movie, sound track and also the poster... Spent lot of time on the capture of the image to make poster...
AAaaahh... Other groups had already done finish and left my group... Next time I need to be more hardworkin.. Hahazz...
VERY no mood today... Because BOYFRIEND did not SMS me at all the whole morning and afternoon... I did SMS her a message only... Really dunno what is she doin now... Really cannot understand what she thinkin now...
I jus dun wish to quarrel with her because I wan to be with her FOREVER and so she also wan... So that I think I dun wan to disturb her when she was workin that all... ARGH... I wan to shout now... I now very BAD TEMPER...
☠❤Dead Jas❤☠8:30 AM
Tuesday, April 15, 2008 ❤
Back to blog... Today really never eat anything because of preparing the presentation... I did lot of research... Search until my HEAVY FLU come back again... And my cough gettin more and more worst...
Today weather damn bad... And I dun like this RAINY weather... Because it make my cough and flu worst...
Anyway, I also quite not so happy because now BOYFRIEND like changed a bit... She dun SMS me anymore... Last time she used to SMS me when she get boring in her work or MISS me... And now, the whole day she only SMS one message to me and her SMS is quite formal... I jus can't feel any love feelin from her...
I think I shall not think too much... Jus treat that she was busy.. Because when I always with her, her attitude was like keep caring for me... But when she was not with me, she then dun SMS me... That why I dun wan to care for her too much or else she will say me I control her too much and she need some space... Whatever...
I also wan her to get well soon... And I do worry for her... I jus wish that I can stay by her side to take care of her now.. I miss her lot lot... Hope that BOYFRIEND will SMS me tonight...
☠❤Dead Jas❤☠6:11 PM
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15th of April.. Now havin lesson... REALLY borin like hell.. No mood to study because not feelin damn well... Heavy FLU come back again and I have breathe with my mouth.. And I havin a little cough... I also feel that something struck in my throat...
Argh... I have been like this since Thursday... When I can recover I also dunno... Really wan to stay at home to rest...
Mmm... Yesterday really had got a chance to see BOYFRIEND... So I shall continue what happen yesterday... After library finishin all my RJ and evaluation, then went to Jurong East Entertainment there to walk around and waited for BOYFRIEND's call or SMS...
At about 6 plus nearly 7pm, BOYFRIEND called and wan me to go to Ghim Moh to wait for her because she needed to settle something work at Lot 1... Sianz... So I reached Ghim Moh at about 7.30pm... And waited for her about 1 hours plus.. She took cab to reach there... Then Next we went to the clinic to register...
After that, we went for dinner at the nearby coffee shop... After dinner, we went back to Clinic outside there... Chatted with BOYFRIEND when waitin for her turn to see doctor... I was tryin to entertainment BOYFRIEND because I dun wan her to feel tired or sianz...
BOYFRIEND did some blood test and also see doctor for the fever... After seeing doctor.., BOYFRIEND sent me home... I dun wan BOYFRIEND sent me home because she was tired and the next day she had to work... But in the end, she sent me home...
BOYFRIEND I LOVE YOU..
☠❤Dead Jas❤☠8:51 AM
Monday, April 14, 2008 ❤
Back to blog... Now I am at Jurong East Library... Haiz... Really felt sick but not down with fever... FLU gettin more and more serious... And somemore I havin a sight headache and also I really cannot hear people talkin quite clear... I dunno tomorrow will be better or not...
GREAT... BOYFRIEND and I jus settle whatever unhappiness... She did said SORRY and wan me to forgive her le... I am so happy that she did SMS me said SORRY to me.. In the past, she will not do that wan... She really do change a lot...
Suppose wan to meet BOYFRIEND because wan to accompany her to see doctor... Firstly took bus 187 to Jurong Point first... This journey was not a good wan because I kept fallin asleep in the bus... Then took train to Ghim Moh and waited at a block near her house... Waited until 2 hours plus... Fell asleep there also...
BOYFRIEND SMS-ed me that they are still havin meetin so dun wan me to wait... So I took train back to Jurong East and here I am in the library waitin for BOYFRIEND next instruction... I really hope that I can meet her... Because I miss her... I think I will not meet her as I am really HUNGRY as I have not eaten any proper meal since morning until now...
Shall wait until her NEXT SMS then I go home... I really can say that the COMPANY SUX sia... Can have meetin for the whole entire day... WTH.. LOUSY company... So many problems like that have not settle... No wonder lot of office staffs dun wish to work at the company longer... They will rather resign than facin more stresses from the company... There goes to the FACTORY that makin the cakes too... THEY VERY CLEVER... I think I will also resign too... I also cannot tahan the new operation manager manage the company... REALLY make all the people SUFFER.. FUCK THE COMPANY!!!
☠❤Dead Jas❤☠5:55 PM
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Back to school again... Argh I am still not feelin damn well... From Thursday till now, I still havin FLU... Today is the FLU got worst... I havin blockin nose now and I have to use my mouth to breathe... Aaahhh...
Mmm... Last night did not really have a proper sleep... Because I havin nose blockin and also not in a good mood as did quarrelled with BOYFRIEND through SMS... I think I only sleep about 3 hours plus... And it is not continously sleep... I did woke up some few minutes or hours of sleep a few times...
As for BOYFRIEND, I did kept on SMS-ing about how I feel toward her and I dun really wan to give up on our relationship because I really using my whole TRUE heart to love her... That why I dun like to give up so easily...
At about 9 plus, she finally sms-ed me that she was sorry about yesterday... And I know that she is busy now... Because she is at the Company there havin meetin with the office staffs... I wish to know she was sorry with what... Is she willin to stay with me FOREVER or she wan to break?? I am confusin...
Today I really force myself to come school... Because of the daily grade... And somemore today I not feelin well... Nose blockin and Cough... I cannot really hear people talking easily... Because Too heaty in my body...
Really hope that time can past faster... Jus wan to go back home to rest... REALLY..!!! I really hate to stay in school with my illness on... Feelin so uncomfortable... I have the thinkin of Pon-in school but my mother dun allow me to be back home too early.. That why I have to stay in school... Argh HATE it...
☠❤Dead Jas❤☠10:00 AM
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14th of April... I really very DISAPPOINTED about BOYFRIEND... She will rather share her problem to her BEST FRIEND and not her DEAR, me... I really kinda of havin a feelin of being betray.. Like usin me to get near of all other staffs...
I really dunno what actually happen in between us... I dunno why BOYFRIEND can really get angry so easily jus cause of little things... I think I have let her too much in the past and now I think I will not to be so kind-hearted... I jus simply feel a sudden of stupidness that I have trusted her too much...
I wan to let go of her but my heart dun bear... I really even dunno which words should trust BOYFRIEND... Every sms-es that she sent really comin out of her TRUE HEART or jus playin with my feelin...
I thought I can stay by her side FOREVER but I think I am wrong... I shall see how it work out first before I say something bad to her... Shall see what she will SMS me in the next SMS maybe tomorrow or next next day or either next week..?? I also will not know... If really she never SMS me again, I think I shall jus leave her alone and find another person... Let her think that I am a 2-timer person... This is all HER FAULT...
☠❤Dead Jas❤☠12:29 AM
Saturday, April 12, 2008 ❤
Wee~~ Finally... I got myself an Ipod... Silver in colour... Nice nice... Love it.. But still not use to in importing the songs into the Ipod... In the afternoon, BOYFRIEND got to go back to work at Lot 1 because the outlet opened and cannot accompany me to go out...
Asked my mother and father to accompany me... So at 4pm like that got out the house... And luckily the rain was not that BIG... I wore a Jacket as Outside is cold to me... Father never drive car... So sianz had to walk to the market there to take the BUS...
Went to Court first to see the price of that Ipod... Man it really EXPENSIVE... 500 PLUS dollar... So went to Level 3 to see the Ipod... Wah... This time the shop sell only 300 plus... Difference is about 100 plus... OMG...
So bought it and also bought the casing of the Ipod... Althogether is about 400 plus... Spent quite lot of money... Then after that went to shop for clothes... Really can't find any nice clothing that suit me in the shoppin centre... SUX..
Mmm... BOYFRIEND now havin FEVER and can say is Very sick... And she also havin FLU... Damn... I think the FLU is my fault... Because that day (Thursday) we went out together and that time I not feelin so well... I was down with FLU... Haiz... My virus... People who read my blog and study the same class as me better take care of yourself first because I very scared that my virus will spread to you all on Monday if you all get near me...
My FLU has not really recover... And I feel so HORRIBLE... Argh... And jus now I feelin like sick and yet now I not feelin like sick again... I think the Heat in my body is like playin with me... Man... Really can't make my heat out of my body...
Tomorrow goin to work... Cannot escape anymore... I have escaped today because I have reason I not feelin so well... And the bad new is that I got to work from morning until night... I feel so uncomfortable for this few days... I really hope that I can really recover soon...
☠❤Dead Jas❤☠11:59 PM
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12th of April.. Argh.. Really feelin like so uncomfortable.. Still havin runnin nose but the worst is that I have no more energy to do anything after sleepin half the day of last Friday... I still feelin damn TIRED... Like Sick like that... The heat in my body still not out yet.. Tryin to let me SUFFER...
Today never meet BOYFRIEND... Sianz.. Because last minute call up that she need to work at Lot 1.. MISS HER.. Haiz...
Later I shall go Jurong Point with my mother accompany me.. Because I wan to buy an I-pod... So that I can listen to more songs.. Wee~~
Today the whole day doin nothing like that... Sms-ing BOYFRIEND, Online watching Hei Se Hui Mei Meis... And nothing else to do... Life is gettin more and more boring...
☠❤Dead Jas❤☠1:28 PM
Friday, April 11, 2008 ❤
This is the 3rd entry of today... Hahazz... Today blog lot of stuffs... Wee~~ Break record... Mmm... Whole day stayin at home never go out or wat... Online downloadin some nice Chinese and Cantonese music...
Today say real really not feelin damn well... In the afternoon, my eyes turn really itchy and watery... Somemore I felt a little cold... My nose havin runnin nose... And I can say that I am goin to get fever really soon...
Now my eyes do not feel any itchy and watery... Jus that I still havin runnin nose and dunno tomorrow will I get a FEVER... Really is HARD to say.. I really hope that I can down with fever... Because I really long time never sick and I wan to have a GOOD rest if I am sick...
Really happy jus now chattin with BOYFRIEND through SMS... She actually has started to plan our future... Hahazz... I also did start a bit by savin my money and reduce what things that I wan to buy... So that we will have a better future..
I am happy that BOYFRIEND SMS me some stuffs that BOYFRIEND will seldom SMS me...
Some of the SMSes that she SMS-ed to me ❤❤❤
(1) Actually I really love you alot.. I worry I will lose you and actually I long time wan you to marry me cos I already think through everything about our future..
(2) Actually I wan to stay yr side 24 hours to accompany you but I cannot I have to work.. I wan to earn as much money as I wan then we can go holiday together and I also wan to be as normal family like other... But you will regret cos I cannot be normal guy can give you everything and my pay is to low for you. Sorry to let you suffer with me..
(3) Sorry, I always let you suffer about our thing.. I really hope that you will not regret. If really anything happen we must remember our love and no one can force us to break and we must forgive each other...
Really Touchin to me when she Sms-ed these few messages to me... I promise I will not leave BOYFRIEND and will love her FOREVER... Nobody can BREAK us up as we had really went through all the problems..
Tomorrow will be goin out with BOYFRIEND in the afternoon... Wee~~ Only nearby... Because I wan to buy an I-pod.. And will visit my Gan Meimei a while ba... Got to go sleep.. Good night PEOPLE.. ❤
☠❤Dead Jas❤☠11:16 PM
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Argh... Damn.. Today never go to school... Suppose wake up at 6.20am but think it is too early and went back to sleep... In the end, my alarm never wake me up at 6.45am... Dunno why... Woke upat 7am again... But think that I will be late of school already so continue to sleep..
Anyway, I am not feelin damn well... I havin a FLU now... Feelin so uncomfortable and somemore my throat like got something struck... Aaahh... I think I am damn TIRED... Somemore yesterday I still walked in the rain when it never get bigger yet... Until I walked halfway, suddenly the rain got really BIG... And I have to rush to the nearby building to avoid the rain...
Anyway today I woke up at 12 something nearly 1pm... And I still feelin damn TIRED... Argh.. No energy at all... Still have not have any breakfast... Lazy to walk out of my room... Mmm... Chattin a while with my classmates to know what is happening in the class now... Hahazz..
BOYFRIEND is sick now... BOYFRIEND sorry that I cannot go to your house to take care of you because your aunty.. And I really hope that I can go and see you... Anyway, GET well soon... Miss you BOYFRIEND... I LOVE YOU...
☠❤Dead Jas❤☠1:02 PM
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Really hate the way of how Republic Poly teachin method... Everyday need to present and do research... Really sick and tired of that... And somemore I HATE TALKIN TO THE CLASS and I dun like to ask question in class... Wan me to talk in class or ask question is like askin me to DIE instead..
Lesson was somehow boring... Cannot do any Roleplay or presentation... Really quite a tough thing to think about how we wan to present... Yup I am happy that today 6th P I did not fall asleep... Hahazz... Because 6th P was about lookin at the photos and ask that IS THAT AN ART TO US..
Tomorrow will be havin DIRECTING AND PERFORMANCE... Sound fun.. Will be havin lesson about Drama... Think so... Everyone in my classis lookin forward for this module... Lolz... An actress will be teachin us this module... Wee~~~ But she is not an popular actress to me... Hahazz...
After school, BOYFRIEND did not come my school to fetch me because she woke up late and told me that she not feelin quite well... So she said she will meet me at Orchard.. So I reached at Orchard and went to Taka to buy some fashion mazagines...
Next went to Cathay... So BOYFRIEND still not there yet.. So set at Level 5 alone and readin my mazagine until she came... She late for 1 hour... And I almost wan to finish the whole book of the mazagine soon... Lolzzz...
Next we bought the tickets of the movie named "Check It Out, Yo!"... It is a Japan Comedy movie... Yup quite nice... There are also included some jokes inside the movie... I will rate the movie for 3 out of 5 stars...
About 9 somehing, we walked back to Cathay... On the way back, I bought an ice-cream from the MacDonald... BOYFRIEND did not eat... Lolzz.. BOYFRIEND kept laughin at the way I lickin the ice-cream... Because it was a bit R21... Hahazz... She said I got the skill was lickin it... I really cannot use teeth to bite the ice-cream because my teeth is damn sensitive to the ice-cream... Whatever...
Back to Cathay, went for toilet at Level 6 and back to Level 5 to buy some drink and a tib-bit... Then headed to Level 9 for the movie... We set at the Couple seat... Yay... Love the Couple seat so much... Because during the movie can hug BOYFRIEND...
Movie end at about 11 plus... Nearly 12pm... There was no more MRTs goin back to Jurong East... DAMN... So plan to take bus 502.. Walked to The previous station of the Somerset... End out no more MRTs to Jurong East and also dun have bus to Jurong West...
So decided to take Bus no.14 to Clementi and then Bus no.105 to Jurong East... And took cab back home... Hahazz... Really had lot of fun with BOYFRIEND today... Tomorrow not meetin BOYFRIEND cause she will be workin... Will MISS HER DE...
☠❤Dead Jas❤☠1:52 AM
Thursday, April 10, 2008 ❤
10th of April... Eee... BORING... Today LESSON is damn SUX.. I hate it... Jus look at the title of the module, I feel that it is a really BORING class...
Maybe plan wan to pon... Because I started to MISS BOYFRIEND and wan to see her early... So that I have more time to see her and accompany me... Hee heezz..
Really had no mood to study... MISS BOYFRIEND like hell.. Now waitin for BOYFRIEND SMS see she wan to meet me early... Hee heezz... LOVE YOU BOYFRIEND FOREVER..
☠❤Dead Jas❤☠9:47 AM
Wednesday, April 09, 2008 ❤
Woo~~ Today lesson was great... A new facilitator who jus joined in the Republic Poly taught us Digital Media Arts... He is a really kind facilitator.. Easily to mix around...
GOOD... Today we have lunch together with the class... Some of them did not follow... About Ten something people of us went to W4 there to eat.. All of them ate rice and I ate breads.. Because I dun feel like eatin RICE yet...
Have fun talkin with my new classmates... Anyway, it is great to know them quite well... As their characters are easily to get along... After lunch, went back to class...
This Strawberry Chocolate was my lunch... Hee heezz..
Lesson end at 3 plus... And went back home straight... Because BOYFRIEND had no time to meet me for dinner... She got to work... Tomorrow will be meetin her for date... Hee heezz... MISS HER much..
☠❤Dead Jas❤☠6:32 PM
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9th of April.. Another day of school... Really hate school damn much... Wasting my time to study those bit by bit stuffs... Really had enough... Suppose plan to quit school and jus work... Now my target is to work and earn more money for future... I already have started to think of this since February of this year...
I am tired and sleepy... Because really had not enough time to sleep.. Weekend work... Some more long hours and weekdays have to go to school to study... Argh... Maybe shall pon one day to rest...
Today dunno will meet BOYFRIEND for dinner because BOYFRIEND still has not sms me for dinner... She might be busy workin today.. Because got one staff cannot come and work today... >.<..
Lookin forward tomorrow after school... BOYFRIEND will be comin to my school to meet me and went for a date tomorrow... Wee~~ LOVE BOYFRIEND FOREVER...
☠❤Dead Jas❤☠8:52 AM
Tuesday, April 08, 2008 ❤
Back to blog again... HAPPY... School was damn BORING like hell... Went break to find Mabel at her class at W45H.. Together went to W4 the food heaven to buy a drink... Never eat because too many people... Lazy to Q up..
Together went to my class to sit for a while... After that, she went back to her class... Mmm.. Hate the facilitator today... She got a very BAD attitude lor... Dun like her teachin... Say what write rubbish RJ deduct our marks... FUCK la... Where got this RUBBISH?? Somemore still cannot write out of point or others... Or else she will deduct...
Fell asleep during her 6th P... Because I am damn TIRED... I will like that the facilitator dun tell any jokes to the class... Because all her jokes are damn FUCKIN lame... Not funny at all... Only for small kids... I dun find her jokes funny at all... FUCKIN sianz lor...
After school, faster finish my RJ and others... Then finally packed my bag and went to Lot 1 to find BOYFRIEND... Hee heezz... BOYFRIEND was quite busy.. So I went to Level 3 to buy my bag for school... Then went back to Basement 1 to wait for BOYFRIEND...
Met BOYFRIEND at 5 plus... And went up to Level 3 the Halal food court to eat... Love to eat with BOYFRIEND... Chatted for a while... And at 5.46pm like that, accompanied BOYFRIEND to Level 1 and went back home by myself... MISSED BOYFRIEND damn much... Dun feel like leavin her...
☠❤Dead Jas❤☠7:07 PM
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Today School again... Was damn BORIN... Say real thing that I dun really LOVE to talk to people... Jus dunno why... Very tired to open my mouth... I HATE IT... Mmm... Sometimes I dun open my mouth, people might think that I am a proud person... Actually, I am not... Because I am not a person who always love to talk... I think I have joined the WRONG school... Felt regret of joinin this DAMN STUPID BORING SCHOOL...
Looking forward to finish school because will be goin to Lot 1 to meet BOYFRIEND for dinner.... Yay... Misses BOYFRIEND so so much... Did not celebrate our 1st month Anniversary because BOYFRIEND is busy... No time to accompany me... She workin today... Haiz... Sad... BOYFRIEND I LOVE YOU FOREVER...
☠❤Dead Jas❤☠10:26 AM
Monday, April 07, 2008 ❤
Today school was SUX... So boring... Fell asleep in the class during the last group presentation and the 6th P... Sms-ed with BOYFRIEND for a while during 6th P.. Tomorrow school again... Haiz...
After school, went to Lot 1 to meet BOYFRIEND for dinner... Yay finally can see her... Went to third floor to eat...Wee~~ I ate Tuna and Bacon and also the Chocolate Mousse... BOYFRIEND ate the Spicy Chicken and a cup of Coke...
After dinner, walked around with BOYFRIEND... Went to a few shops to find SHUTTER(Thai Version) DVD... All said No stock already.. So order from a shop...
I felt so happy that I can hold BOYFRIEND's hand... BOYFRIEND sent me to Choa Chu Kang station there... Then I have to go off... Because BOYFRIEND had to work that why cannot accompany me too long... Really miss her lot lot...
BOYFRIEND will be callin me tonight... Can't wait for her call... Wee~~ Love BOYFRIEND deeper and deeper in each day...
☠❤Dead Jas❤☠7:31 PM
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7th of April... Argh... First day of school... Damn boring... I hate SCHOOL... Dun like to study at all... But listen to BOYFRIEND for my own good... Sianz..
Yesterday work damn bad... Feelin damn unluckily... Kept droppin things... Food dropped on the floor so wasted cannot eat... BOYFRIEND laughed at me... Haiz... BOYFRIEND very good... She worked until closing yesterday because someone took MC cannot come... So BOYFRIEND replaced that person's person...
BOYFRIEND should be very jealous yesterday... Because one tomboy worked from QUICKBITE came to POLAR to buy food... Hahaz.. The tomboy last time like wan to know me wan... Yesterday that Tomboy never work and come to POLAR to buy a strawberry roll... BOYFRIEND liked start to angry a bit... I can see from her face... Then she came again with her mother and her brother with a VOUCHER...
No choice BOYFRIEND was busy and I have to service they all... Really dun feel like servicing them de... BOYFRIEND said that maybe that tomboy wan to woo me... I say to my BOYFRIEND that if she wan to woo me I will reject... Because I dun flirt and I only LOVE my BOYFRIEND forever... And somemore that TOMBOY really got GIRLFRIEND...
After work, did not really go straight home... Went to the playground near my house... Hugged BOYFRIEND for a long time... Really love that feelin... Hee heezz... At about 12.54am, BOYFRIEND then sent me up to my house... MISS BOYFRIEND so much after leavin her goin home..
Today not meetin BOYFRIEND because she workin... And I havin school le... This week only can see BOYFRIEND for 2 days... Saturday and Sunday only... Maybe... If free, I might be goin to Lot 1 to see BOYFRIEND for a while...
☠❤Dead Jas❤☠12:42 PM
Saturday, April 05, 2008 ❤
5th of April... Yesterday was quite a funny day to me.. Went to work... Did openin all by myself... BOYFRIEND worked at 9.30am but she late again... After that, her BEST FRIEND came... I was quite no mood because I was JEALOUS... They left me out... I jus felt that her BEST FRIEND like dun like me at all... Jus dunno why...
BOYFRIEND scolded me during work in front of her BEST FRIEND... Because some of the work reason... Shall not say it here... I jus dun wan to let everyone know... I really dunno what actually happen she jus scolded me like that...
So hack care... Dun talk with BOYFRIEND... At 3pm, I went off... Sms-ed BOYFRIEND to say SORRY... But she never reply to me at all...
Went to Jurong Point to work until night... During workin, I did Sms-ed to BOYFRIEND that not to angry... I also dun wan to break jus because of work... That why I try to give way.... Or else if quarrel, we will break wan..
After that, went to Jurong East to meet BOYFRIEND... BOYFRIEND was late because of work got problem... I was prayin quite hard that BOYFRIEND dun angry...
Met BOYFRIEND... Feelin happy when I saw her... Luckily, she never angry... She only act act... I try to make her laugh when walkin on the way to Jurong East Entertainment centre... Reached the movie place, suppose wan to watch SHUTTER but there is no SHUTTER... So decided to watch that FLOOD movie...
To me is quite okok... Some talkin part seem a little boring... But I like that the FATHER because he can give up everything and saved everyone in the country like a hero.. He did not success to survive in the end...
After movie, took cab back home with BOYFRIEND... And great that BOYFRIEND came my house to sleep... Hahazz... This was the 2nd time since last year... Actually, we did not sleep... I helped her to transfer songs to her handphone using my laptop in the dark... She was enjoyin liein on my bed..
We had being naughty people... Because we did something bad on bed... Hee heezz... Lie on BOYFRIEND's body to chat with her... This was my first time that we chatted close heart to heart.. Really enjoy the time with BOYFRIEND... Never feel regret of being with her in the start of our relationship begin...
At 6 plus in the morning, sent BOYFRIEND out of my house when everyone still asleep and my mother had gone to work... Because I never tell anyone in my family that BOYFRIEND coming my house to sleep.. Hee heezz...
☠❤Dead Jas❤☠2:06 PM
Thursday, April 03, 2008 ❤
Argh... I now not in quite good mood... I wan to let go my temper... But I cannot... Really very feelin not so good keepin my that very bad temper inside my body and not lettin it out... Aaaaaaaaahhh...
Today never go out with BOYFRIEND... Because BOYFRIEND last minute cancel due to the very bad weather... I hate it... Cannot see BOYFRIEND I miss her DAMN LOT... Haiz... I was happy and lookin forward to meet her but in the end, the weather stop me to meet her... HATE THE BLOODLY WEATHER...
Tomorrow midnight after work.., I think I will meet her for movie... I dun wan to miss out the chance to see her... Because when school reopen, I think I might even have lesser time to see her... I am jus worry that I might lose her... That why I dun feel like studyin anymore and wan to work..
BOYFRIEND had not SMS me since evening... I have SMS-ed her a lot of sms-es and she did not reply.. I really dunno what happen to her... I jus quite worry about her now... I hope that she can faster reply me...
☠❤Dead Jas❤☠8:11 PM
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3rd of April... It is 9.30am... Later goin to work at 10am... Will be workin until 5pm... Then after that will be goin to Orchard to meet BOYFRIEND for a dinner and Movie... Hee heezz...
Yesterday was not a good day because I was quite feelin robot like that, which mean like no feelin... Worked at Jurong Point in the mornin at 9am to 4pm then went to Lot 1 to work from 5pm to 10.35pm...
Almost all the work were left uncompleted... Haiz.. I hate myself always never finish my job.. When other people see it, they helped me to do... Because I was busy doin other stuffs... Haiz.. Felt so guilty when they helped me...
Hope later everything shall be fine.. And I hope I will not feelin that mood again... Really hate myself when I am in that mood...
☠❤Dead Jas❤☠9:28 AM
Tuesday, April 01, 2008 ❤
Rushed to bus-stop to wait for bus to Boon Lay station... Almost late by a few minutes... But luckily, I am the earliest... Went to buy a food to eat.. So that I might not feel so hungry...
Met 2 other Jurong Point staffs and set MRT to Kallang and then BUS no.12 to EAST COAST ROAD there... Reached the outlet and into an air-con to get ready for our company trainin course...
After eatin lunch, I felt that my gastric not feelin damn well... This pain really can make me cannot stand up and walk... I jus hope that I wan to go home right now... I force myself to stay...
After lunch, went back to the outlet again... Whatever... LESSON started again.. Almost fell asleep in the lesson... Really quite sianz sometimes...
I did Sms-ed to BOYFRIEND to tell her that I got gastric pain... Really cannot take it... She only sent 2 sms back after a few hours I sent to her... I guess she was busy with her work.. That why no time to care for me..
Lesson ended at 5 plus.. Went back home straight away... Supposed plan to wait for BOYFRIEND finish work.. But never go because my gastric pain still not recover... It seem a little more worst... Really cannot stand too much... Haiz... I really miss BOYFRIEND...
Fell asleep in the MRT and bus... Felt a little much better.. Not so serious pain... Mmm... Did not really have the mood to eat... But I still force myself to eat so that my gastric will not be so pain...
Now waitin for my BOYFRIEND to finish work at home so that later I wan to SMS her to chat... I MISS HER LOT LOT...
☠❤Dead Jas❤☠9:14 PM
