Tuesday, December 30, 2008 ❤
Time checked 9.57pm... Now waiting for BOYFRIEND to finish work... I am sure she is working right now... Hope that she is a bit fine by now... Really quite worry about her... Though I am at home...
After her work, I will try to SMS her and hope that she will reply me to make me stop worry about her a bit.. BOYFRIEND please get well soon... I do need her a lot...
☠❤Dead Jas❤☠9:57 PM
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30th of December... 2nd last day of 2008... Morning had a small quarrel with BOYFRIEND through handphone.. Reason will not mention at here... Feeling so much tired.. 2 continuous day morning shift is damn TIRING... Sianz...
Tomorrow goin out at night with friends... Goin to K... Really LONG LONG never go K... Wee~~ Goin to orchard after work... I think I got to rush there... Thought my working scheme is morning but it is jus mid shift... Until 10pm...
Suppose ask BOYFRIEND to come along... But BOYFRIEND not feeling well so cannot come along... So sad... Anyway, hope that BOYFRIEND can really get well soon... I quite worry for her... Because SMS her, she did not reply to me at all... Haiz..
Today after work bought something to eat... It is my lunch and dinner meal... I bought Chicken Bologese and chocolate Mousse from PASTAMANIA... I really damn LONG did not eat... So bought it..
My most favourite Chocolate Mousse... I will never fail to have this if I eat PASTAMANIA... Taste like eating Chocolate Ice-cream... YUMMY...
The Chicken Bologese... I LOVE it a lot also...
Now staying at home alone... Watching 霹靂MIT... Really bored like hell... SMS-ed BOYFRIEND a few SMSes... Yet no reply from her... Wonder what she doing right now... Really missing her a lot a lot... Haiz... This is my FIRST time to have this problem in my whole entire of life...
Really hope that BOYFRIEND can be like last time... Last time she so sweet and loving to me... That make me can't stop loving her a lot a lot... Maybe in next time if I got time I might go temple to pray and ask for clue in future for our relationship... That was I always did this in the past...
☠❤Dead Jas❤☠3:55 PM
Monday, December 29, 2008 ❤
29th of December... Feeling so much lonely.. Jus wish to change job at the sudden... Because I jus wan to have another NEW life... I quite hate my life now... If can, really jus hope that I can end my life... I hate to step into this adult working world... It is damn cruel than I ever think since I am young...
Haiz... BOYFRIEND still having HIGH fever... And she now tried to avoid all my sms-es... My care and concern become so USELESS...
Sms-ed her ask her how she feeling yet she never reply me at all... I so super hurt by her every reactions and actions that she gave me.... I jus wonder when she can be like LAST TIME... No matter how sick or what, she will SMS me and tell me... She has changed to a person who I dunno at all...
To stop my worry about her and to keep myself forget my hurt from her, I bought a Taiwanese Series... "霹靂MIT"... FINALLY... I no need to keep waiting and waiting... Can finish at one shot...
Lastly., if BOYFRIEND can see this entry on my blog, please do SMS me and tell me how you feel now... I really worry you a lot a lot... My handphone will not switch off for this 24 hours EVERYDAY... PLEASE dun make me WORRY... And GET WELL SOON..
. 
I had this after my dinner.. Jus feel like eating this at a SUDDEN!!
☠❤Dead Jas❤☠8:11 PM
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29th of December... Thinking of BOYFRIEND right now... Worrying her so much also... Yesterday BOYFRIEND did not come for work... Felt so sad that cannot see her... This few days also will not see her too...
BOYFRIEND now having HIGH fever... Yet I am the LAST to know... This shown that I am the LEAST important person in her heart... Everytime she always hide her things from me... I wonder how much she wan to hide from me...
I do really hope that I can really be her most important person... Whenever she need help or whatever, she will always come and find me... That is how a person shown a LOVE to their LOVE one...
I worry BOYFRIEND right now... Because SMS her, she ignore and never reply... Thinking of wan to call her but I scared I will disturb her rest... I so so so much worry... I wonder why BOYFRIEND wan to make me worry always... Haiz... Yesterday I dun even have mood to eat only ate a cup of ice-cream... THAT ALL..
I wonder when can BOYFRIEND do treat me as her most important person in her heart.. BABY HUBBY if you see my BLOG, please do SMS me to tell me how you feeling now...?? I do WORRY YOU a lot a lot... I really cannot concentrate on whatever I do... My heart is always THINKING about you 24 hours non-stop... ARGH~~~!!!
☠❤Dead Jas❤☠1:39 AM
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19 WAYs TO WIN A GIRLS' HEART~~❤❤❤
1. Hugs from behind
2. Grab her hand when you walk next to each other(don't make her grab yours)
3. When standing, wrap your arms around her
4. Cuddle with her
5. DON'T FORCE HER TO DO ANYTHING
6. Write little notes
7. Compliment her Honestly
8. When you hug her, hold her in your arms as long as possible
9. Be super sweet to her
10. Call her at night to wish her sweet dreams
11. Comfort her when she cries
12.Wipe away her tears
13. Love her with all your heart
14. Pick her up and flirt with her (she'll scream and say put me down but really she loves it)
15. Be a gentleman (hold the door for her)
16. Don't let your friends talk trash about her, it'll get back 2 her!
& DONT ever act diff in front of ur friends than u r when its just u and her!!!!
17. Take her for a long walk at night!
18. Always bring a blanket where ever you go outside when its cold to comfort her and hold her close
19. NEVER LIE TO HER!!!!!! because then she will think everything you ever said to her was a lie, even "i love you"
I agree with these all... If really one day BOYFRIEND can really did all these, my heart will really melt jus for her ONLY.. And I will LOVE HER deeply ever after...
☠❤Dead Jas❤☠12:17 AM
Sunday, December 28, 2008 ❤
28th of December... Still got left about 3 more days till 2009 comes... Looking forward to that year... Because I wanted to have a NEW start of life... Hope that this coming year my LUCK will be better than this year...
Really reflect back that this year really past quite fast... This year I have been busily working all days... And I did not really realise that 2009 going to come... Thought that tomorrow might be the month of JUNE of 2008... Lol..
I might be confirming that I might goin for some drinks with my friends during the LAST night of 2008.. I also tried to ask my BOYFRIEND to come along... But she still not confirm.. Mmm... Guess BOYFRIEND not coming along again... Wondering when she can be BRAVE to meet my friends.?? Last time, I have been brave that I met some of her friends...
Anyway, jus hope that this coming year 2009 will be a BETTER year for me... Good Luck to me... And also lastly, good night people... Sweet dream..
☠❤Dead Jas❤☠1:40 AM
Saturday, December 27, 2008 ❤
Back to blog... Jus now woke up at 1.30pm... Still not the latest time I wake up... Now missing BOYFRIEND right now and also cannot SMS her as she said before that try dun SMS her unless is important stuffs.. I controlled myself really hard.. Because I dun wan to disturb her... I wan her to rest more..
Haiz... I am really bored right now... Nobody is at home ONLY me... Is damn quiet in my house... But also quite good.. Because nobody can nag at me... Hahazz... I can do whatever thing I wan to do...
Mmm... Found that my handphone bills increase... Dunno why like that... Sianz... I have try to reduce using handphone yet my bill still so high... ARGH... Think because I have use too much of money in buying credit in an online game...
I AM TOO BORING~~!!!
☠❤Dead Jas❤☠2:50 PM
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27th of December... It is already past Christmas for about 2 days... Yup FINALLY saw BOYFRIEND... And I also did gave BOYFRIEND Christmas present... I do hope she LOVE it... Hee heez... I bought it about 3 days ago... Supposed plan to write a card and gave it together with the present but in the end NO.. Because LAST MINUTE being call up to rush for work... So never wrote a card... Haiz... Waste my plan...
Looking forwad for my birthday next year... O ya... Friends asking me to join them for some drink during the COUNT DOWN party.. I wish to go but I still dunno that day I working or not... And I also hope that BOYFRIEND can accompany me along... Mmm.. Jus that everytime BOYFRIEND reject my date with my friends along... Wonder when she will be BRAVE to face my friends...??
I think I shall be goin to join them as is really LONG LONG time never meet them... And also I LONG LONG time never go for drink.. I miss DRINKING... Hee heezz... And that day I do really dun wish to go for work during the NEW YEAR day... Sianz...
Hope this coming year 2009 will be a BETTER year for me... Everything go smooth.. This year 2008 was not a VERY GOOD year for me.. So many bad luck happen on me... And I hate this year 2008...
Lastly, I hope that BOYFRIEND can RECOVER soon... She is SICK now.. HORRIBLY... So sad that I cannot stay by her side to look after her... Her voice changed till I kinda of really cannot take it... I hope that she can dun come for work for a period so that she can rest well.. BABY HUBBY you worry me a lot... GET WELL SOON.. I LOVE YOU lot...
Today shall be a SHORT POST for me... Good night people..
☠❤Dead Jas❤☠1:17 AM
Friday, December 26, 2008 ❤
26th of December.. It is already past Christmas... I am really quite happy about my day... Though without BOYFRIEND accompany me by my side... Without me by her side, she als do not feel anything or what wan... As long as she got friends around her, she will happy like the world has ended...
During Christmas, I did received some presents... Wee~~ First time got Christmas present... This is a return... As I bought them a Log cake for the aunties to eat... They bought a box of chocolates and a doll, Mickey Mouse's Girlfriend... Lolz.. Really must thank them a lot.. This few days they did treated me a lot of things...
Later returning to my own original workplace... And I really kinda of dun feel like goin to work at all... Jus dunno why... I jus had this feeling...
I also not so look forward to see BOYFRIEND at all... Because BOYFRIEND changed a lot a lot... Not like the one in the past that I love a lot a lot... The way she talk to me and other people are TOTALLY different... The way she talk to other people are really FLIRTING.. Making me feel so DISGUSTED... Sorry for saying bad things at here... As this is my BLOG...
I no longer love to hear BOYFRIEND sweet talk to me... Because BOYFRIEND's sweet talk often being heard so oftenly when she talked to other people... So othing special to me anymore... I no longer look forward for BOYFRIEND saying those 3 Golden words to me anymore...
I now only miss the old BOYFRIEND badly... I know that the old BOYFRIEND will not be back again to come and love me... My brain and heart keep thinking again and again that when will the old BOYFRIEND will come back again...
Now I no longer understand what BOYFRIEND's thinking and feeling... Everything she is being hiding from me... She even dun bother about my worry for her... I do really feel regret that why gods wan me to meet her in my life?? That time I should jus follow my friend reject this damn TIRING work... So that I will not able to have a chance to meet her...Anyway, what happen already happen... I jus hope that everything will become smooth... I do really look forward about BOYFRIEND and my 10th month anniversary, my 20th birthday and also my FIRST Valentime day... I hope that BOYFRIEND can do her part as a guy to give me as a girlfriend a SURPRISE... I really very very tired and stress to continue to contribute the LOVE by my ownself only...
Lastly.., BABY HUBBY I still LOVE you a lot a lot... Hope that you can change back to the one that I love the most in the past..
☠❤Dead Jas❤☠2:12 AM
Thursday, December 25, 2008 ❤
25th of December... MERRY CHRISTMAS to all the people... I dun feel like today is CHRISTMAS at all... Like jus a normal day like that... Looking lot of people preparing to go for Christmas party or whatever... I never feel so admire...
I really dunno when I will have a chance to celebrate my very FIRST own Christmas... Haiz.. I do always hope that I can celebrate my Christmas with my LOVE one (SPECIAL one)... Looking for next year... Really do... Because my birthday is really coming soon... In less than 50 days.. I guess so... O.o... So happy...
And also Valentime day is also coming soon... If BOYFRIEND and me can really continue our relationship.., this year I might going to have my VERY FIRST Valentime day with my BOYFRIEND... I never ever have a stead that can really celebrate with me Valentime day...
I really dunno will BOYFRIEND will give me any surprises on that day like all the couples on the street... SO SWEET... Yet my BOYFRIEND dunno what is sweet or romantic now this period... Last time she really romantic and sweet to me.. Because she willing to give up your busy stuffs and spent her time with me.. That why I love her that very much in the past..
But now, I dun even hope to look forward about anything on her... Everytime make me hurt and disappointed... Said wan to meet me but in the end said another day... Then when that day come she made another excuses... Actually in my heart, I feel so much excited to meet her and keep looking at the time hoping that time can past faster so that I can meet her... But to her, I dun think she had this kinda of feeling...
I wonder why do BOYFRIEND always give me so confuse in her... And always like take me for granted... Somehow I do feel like I am jus a PART-TIME Girlfriend to her... NOT a FOREVER wifey to her.. I kinda of sad right now... Worrying everyday about that she might change her heart or regret to love her in future... Because I have been giving her chances again and again... And if she never reject the chance, my love for her might be DEEPER and DEEPER...
That mean if one day she dun LOVE me., I might dunno what I will done to myself or to her... I jus scared I might lost my ownself...
☠❤Dead Jas❤☠1:44 AM
Wednesday, December 24, 2008 ❤
24th of December... Today is the day Christmas Eve... OMG.. And also the day for the war... I jus can't think of work later what is goin to happen....
Guess what.. Really come true... I cut my finger yesterday again... Very pain... A quite LONG cut at my RIGHT hand little finger... Each day 1 cut... Scaredly... Sianz... Dunno why always kena cut... Hope that later I dun cut my hand again... *PRAY HARD*.. Haiz... Why am I always so unlucky and so careless...??
Yesterday work was quite smooth and fun... Because dun feel stress from work.. But the only thing that this was my quite FIRST time that I can work till SWEAT like hell... I really never do that before... Hahazz... I am so hardworking.. Lolz...
Those aunties are quite good.. Bought me meal... Burger King meal.. Thank a lot man... And also bought me a drink from Sweet Talk... Because they jus scared me not enough energy to work... And scared I faint... Hahazz...
25th is the day to THANK them... I bought something and will give them on 25th of December... Actually is a cake for them to eat.. Hope that they will LOVE it...
Anyway, Happy Christmas Eve to all people who are reading my blog right now... Hope that you all can celebrate a UNFORGETTABLE christmas with your LOVE one... I dun have a christmas date because I working... Sad...
☠❤Dead Jas❤☠12:16 AM
Tuesday, December 23, 2008 ❤
23th of December... Yesterday was the FIRST day to work at Jurong Point.. It was so call not so BUSY day yet I can tired like hell.. From the morning till night... Jus kinda of busy with the things.. I did a lot of things in work... Yet I found that I have not enough time to drink some water or go for a Toilet...
I have been realising that some aunties always LOVE to chit chat and never do work... But however, I feel bad to hate them as they treated me so good... Always buy me food when they saw me hungry or whatever... That why I always never hate them... And I jus dun wan them to be tired.. So I do all the washing trays and carry heavy stuffs..
Yesterday BOYFRIEND did came down to Jurong Point to collect her cake... Jus dunno why I do feel jealous... Maybe because people who are jus friend with her can get a present from her but as a GIRLFRIEND of her will not get a present from her at all or either a SURPRISE from her...
Thinking in my mind and heart., the BEST and UNFORGETTABLE present is the 3 GOLDEN WORDs coming right from her mouth at the RIGHT time... Mmm... I will not think that BOYFRIEND really can do it because she do not belong to that person anymore... But last time she was belonged once...
I jus feel that Be her girlfriend must understand her everything, and be more understanding not always show stubborness or bad temper to her... When she need someone to anger on, GIRLFRIEND should be the punch bag to let her release her anger on... Must always behave like an adult... More mature on own thinking so that can help BOYFRIEND when she got trouble...
And I am tring hard to be ONE.. I wan to be her perfect wife.. I working hard on it... But jus that whenever she scolded me, I jus feel like crying... I dun have any strength to fight back with her... And also when I saw her, I dunno why do my heart beat jump so fast..?? And when I am nervous, my hands keep shaking like Earthquake.. Like no strength.. Why do I still have this feeling on her..?? Why is not her to have this feeling..?
Haiz... Later working damn LONG Hours again at Jurong Point... Anyway, jus hope that dun be so BUSY... I hate to be busy... Because I am lazy to do things... But I force myself to do... It is damn TIRING.. Sianz sia...
Saddness.. Dunno what happen to me... On the 22th of December, I have a cut on my RIGHT hand TOP part.. And guess what I have another cut on my LEFT index finger jus YESTERDAY... 1 day 1 cut... Dunno later will I accidently cut myself again?? It is really pain and a small cut had caused to pain...
Lastly.., BOYFRIEND I LOVE YOU~~ Hope that you will miss me in this few days without seeing me...
☠❤Dead Jas❤☠2:23 AM
Monday, December 22, 2008 ❤
22th of December... Now watching 霹靂MIT... Really interesting and nice show... I dun feel like sleeping right now... Jus feel that I wan to watch finish the show... OMG..
Later working LONG LONG hours.. Hee heezz... I think I will feel damn tired... Will not able to see BOYFRIEND everytime now till 26th of December... Yup..
Yesterday last minute had to wake up to rush for work.. I never late for work is jus that I am EARLY for work... A few hours of early.. Because 2 people are sick and no choice have to help... So when I was sleeping then BOYFRIEND called me.. I was like feel damn tired... The whole body like no strength to move about...
Missing BOYFRIEND right now.. BOYFRIEND should be sleeping soundly... Because she will be waking up for work damn damn early.. 4 plus in the morning... Lolz...
Today entry is not so interesting... Typing rubbish.. Sleeping really soon as my eyes are closing really really soon... Good night people...
☠❤Dead Jas❤☠3:01 AM
Sunday, December 21, 2008 ❤
21th of December.. So fast coming to the end of 2008 really soon... 2009 is coming... A brand new year... Hope that everything will be FINE and smooth for the coming year... Today is the LAST day to see BOYFRIEND...
Because on 22th of December till 25th of December., I will be working at Jurong Point... I must help them for their Christmas sale.. No choice... So at least I can no need to go back to Lot 1 for a while.. Hahazz...
I think this period I will damn MISS BOYFRIEND a lot a lot... Wonder BOYFRIEND will miss me... I bet she will not... Haiz.. She jus simply different from last time.. Last time at least when she never see me for a day, she will SMS me that she do miss me.. But now not a single SMS to keep me update about her... SO BORING...
Mmm... Yesterday was a damn tired day for me... I jus simply quite dun understand why do people who are age older than me will always love to take advantages from the people who are younger than them... Like those age of teenagers age always kena being bully by the adult who are aunty age...
I hope that I wish to know the answer... First time working on Saturday with other people and also is 2 persons... But it is seem that I am much more busiest and also pray hard that there are more time for me to finish those work... But in the end, the time still not enough at all...
Mmm... In the work, I clean those display cake shelves and warmer.. Next, I wash those fucking trayes... Then I swept the floor and mopped the floor... Throw rubbish... Whatever... Lot of things to do... No rest like that... Sometimes I jus feel that the people from my work is very UNFAIR.. Some people also know how to 拍马庇 a lot.. And I will not stated who at here... As my BOYFRIEND might know who are them, if she understand my thinking...
Simply I dun trust anyone in work... But the only person I trust the most in this world is BOYFRIEND... She is the number one... Follow by my god sisters and brothers... Then friends...
My work always make me so STRESSFUL and TIRED... Always... Because I cannot see the trust in between the people... And also the team work... They often being so straight-forward... Sometime.., jus make one small little mistake like VERY BIG like that... Actually, no need to be so dramatic wan... And also dunno why the upper position people always love to give problem to the place where I am working now.. But other places no problems at all...
I hope BOYFRIEND can understand this... I know is not easy to sit on your position... But hope that you are doing your part... Make all the people to be more co-operation... And also TEAMWORK is the most important... Sometime, we might be racist.. I know because I can feel it and hear it... Backstabbing one another always... And this is the ACTION I hate the most... That why I always try to avoid the topic from you all... I dun really like to talk bad things behind other people back...
Anyway, BABY you are not ALONE... And I am always supporting you at a sercet place right in your heart... I LOVE YOU a lot... Anyway lastly, THANK for the cup of Hot Milo... Hee heezz... So sweet of you... MISS YOU lot BABY HUBBY...
☠❤Dead Jas❤☠2:29 AM
Friday, December 19, 2008 ❤
O ya... I forget to tell everyone a good new... O ya... Last time my target is 49kg... And now I finally 48kg... Woohoo... LOST 2 kg in ONE year like that... Isn't it so COOL...??
One day eat one meal really help me... Wee... Now target maybe 45kg... 3 more kgs to go... Sure can make it... YAY~~!!
☠❤Dead Jas❤☠9:47 PM
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When I was on the way in the journey, she said that she was back home on the way too... DAMN... And no choice so continue my journey till I reach the hospital... Looking inside the hospital jus make me feel vomit... I jus simply feel not right at all... Dunno why...
Walked about 15 minutes road... Then found the only MRT back to my home... Took train alone so LONELY and sad... No one SMS-ing me or call me... I feel so much alone... Haiz... Why my life is so uninteresting...??
BOYFRIEND only know how to say "SORRY" only... But I do really wish to hear those magic word... Actually, those magic words are really can solve every problems with me easily if you aremy SPECIAL someone... And you no need to use the word "SORRY"...
But I think BOYFRIEND still dunno what the magic words... Haiz... She jus quite not so pro in relationship... I jus wish that she can understand more about me... Anyway..., she is resting right now due to her eyes...
So many different answers from different types of doctors... Dunno which to believe... Anyway, this doctor quite not bad.. And I am going back again for appointment on 30th of December at night... This doctor said if I still not recover I will have injection... OMG... Hate injection...
I missing BOYFRIEND right now... Tomorrow only can see only about hours plus... Sianz sia... I hate being separate with BOYFRIEND always... Hope tomorrow will be the BETTER day for me...
☠❤Dead Jas❤☠8:15 PM
Thursday, December 18, 2008 ❤
18th of December... Sianz... I very tired... Jus feel that life is so much stress... Everything is being control from someone... And even BOYFRIEND and me relationship also goin to being control by something... Jus getting sick and tired... We even cannot being together so easily even when we are outside... Like those normal couple...
I jus wonder why our relationship is so SPECIAL till everyone wish to care or KPO about it... Do you all know I really HATE KPO people..?? I am not talking to those friends who are being close to me... I am relate to those people who dunno me and yet still like act so call "MY FRIEND" to come and KPO me and my BOYFRIEND's BUSINESS...
My anger do have a LIMIT... And this is my only blog that can make me speak out the things that I angry with.. I dun wan to make it private because I wan those people who might be unknow to me and read and share the exprience with me... And not for making fun of people feeling... Or even like gossipe... Do you all know is quite damn fucking RUDE...!!??
Work is work... Personal is personal... Do not never ever put personal things in work or get involve in work... I do always draw a line in between the work and personal.. And I dun really like my personal to get involve in my work...
I do treat people this way... When work, I can be really serious with you and I will never joke around... When after work or before work, I will treat people as my friends and will ask out date when free time... And have fun... I will never ever talk about WORK when I am not working... This is my rule to myself... Because talk about work will feel STRESSES...
Whatever... I jus simply hate those gossipers... And guess what.. I finally decided to deteled some gossipers and KPO people from my website... Because I dun wan my personal things to be spread to those people who really dun care about other people feeling... And make more troubles to the victims...
So today went home early... BOYFRIEND not free and rejected the date from me... But I am glad tomorrow that I goin to accompany her for an appointment... So my planning is that I will take the cab to the hospital after my work... And see I can meet her... If cannot meet her.., I will jus wait outside for her and meet her after her appointment...
I thinking something... I think I will changing my blog song really soon... But still thinking which song to put... A chinese song or a hip hop song...?? Mmm... Both songs are simply too nice to me... Sianz... Maybe will put both songs together.... Hahaz...
O ya... Campus Superstar 3 the TOP 12 is out... OMG.. Only 4 guys and 8 are girls... Really cannot think that in the past... My only memories... The Campus Superstar 1... I took part but too bad that the judges are too bias on the LOOKs... So kena kick out during the 1st audition... But my friends are so luckily that they got into the 3rd round audition...
O another thing is that I found my favourite movie MV... Is so much TOUCHING.. The MV... Lolz... Maybe to my BOYFRIEND she dun feel anything... Because she dun like to watch this type of movies... She like to watch more into action and advantures ENGLISH movie while me is more into ROMANTIC and touching chinese or Japanese movie... Hahazz... Really strange couple of us... Hee heezz...
But the common thing is that we LOVE to watch HORROR movie... Hahazz... Really miss the time that we always watch the movie at midnight after work... ALWAYS without fail... But now health is more important so we never start to watch midnight movie again...
Anyway looking forward for tomorrow... BABY I LOVE YOU...
Do enjoy this MV... My most favourite MV... And also my FAVOURITE movie...
☠❤Dead Jas❤☠9:41 PM
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18th of December... Yesterday no working... Boring... So got to stay in home for the whole entire day... Too tired so slept till about 1pm... Woke up and stay in my room for the whole day till now never ever walk out of my room... Being online till now too..
So I am missing my BOYFRIEND right now so much... Jus simply worry about her... Asked her some questions through SMS also never reply... Aiyo...
Jus now in the afternoon so SURPRISINGLY that BOYFRIEND called me... But only chatted for about 5 minutes plus... VERY SHORT sia... Sianz... I also did waiting for BOYFRIEND to be online so I can chat with her... But she did not online at all...
Mmm... Later working morning... And I am goin to have my sleep soon... Today I decided to sleep early... Looking at the time... It is goin to 1am... Damn... Got to catch some sleep now... Good night people... LOVE~
☠❤Dead Jas❤☠12:34 AM
Wednesday, December 17, 2008 ❤
17th of December... Guess what... I have changed my blog address due to some reasons... I dun wan some people to spread my story to other people.. And also after reading my blog, please dun gossip with other people... Jus keep it to yourself... I having a blog is to express myself and share my feeling to all people not for you all to make fun or SABO other people... That is PRETTY RUDE you know?? ASSHOLE...
I changed my blog address also due to some personal reason... And I am unable to say at here... Those who wan to know why can jus PM me... But I only tell the reason to those people who I trusted the most and closet to me the most... Others I will hack care... So sorry...
I feel so much gulity yesterday... Simply jus feel this way... I dunno why am I always show bad temper to BOYFRIEND whenever BOYFRIEND dun come and talk to me... SORRY BOYFRIEND I know that I am in the wrong... I really hope that you will not mind my temper... Sorry for what I did yesterday...
After work, finally went to supper with BOYFRIEND... Ate the same food at the same place again... Chatted a lot of stuffs... BOYFRIEND pretty worry about her income and also many stuffs... She jus simply feeling too tired... Yet I try very hard to help her...
When troubles come.., always be happy to face the problems and not to be worry or scared... Because the more you scared the more you will hide from your fear... Troubles or problems will easy being disappear if you face them bravely... This is what I always believe in... And this is what I wan to tell to BOYFRIEND...
Although people in the work keep giving you problems.., jus treat them like customers.. Understand their needs and fulfill their request if possible.. I think they will be understanding...
And now... BOYFRIEND is stressing doing her stuffs... And I am now online-ing to accompany her... I hope that she is doing fine now... I miss her so much... Really hope that I can be by her side to make her feel not so stress... And support her so that she will be recharge again to win the war...
BABY HUBBY.., I LOVE YOU lot lot...
☠❤Dead Jas❤☠2:44 AM
Tuesday, December 16, 2008 ❤
16th of December... FUCK I know it... I now SUPER Hurt and disappointed by what BOYFRIEND treat me today... Totally transparent to her... I should know it... I really feel super regret to go to work today... Chee bye...
You all know what?? I today already quite UNWELL.. BOYFRIEND did not really like care about it... Happily talking to the STRONG WALL... Yup... I kept very quiet like I not present in the work... Thought that BOYFRIEND will bother to come forward to talk to me... But in the end, ONLY A BIT...
I know it this will happen... I feel SUPER STRESS and TIRED when the STRONG WALL is between us...
The only time that I can be closer to her is after work... Because I got quite looking forward to talk to her... But only like 15 minutes then the STRONG WALL call her phone and talk with her... Sianz... I cannot talk to her again... Always kena DISTURB.. Talk about more than 30 minutes till never END...
The STRONG WALL treat her very good like hell... Buy her food everytime without FAIL... Today bought her SUBWAY sandwich... GOOD hor... If wan to treat her pls dun buy that la... FUCK OFF... I HATE SUBWAY to the cock... Got a smell that make me feel like VOMITTING... I jus dunno why... And I dunno how to describe...
Everytime walk passed SUBWAY I will never forget to cover my nose from breathing... SUPER DISGUSTING... OMFG lor...
Today suppose wan to ask BOYFRIEND out for supper in the end, BOYFRIEND said she cannot make it... Haiz being REJECTED again... BOYFRIEND needed to buy food for her sister... And I dun think she will eat if she agree... Because she got a LOVE meal... She also cannot eat too much or else she can't eat her LOVE meal...
Sorry people for those BAD WORDs... I feel so much better after saying all these things out... LASTLY, I HATE THAT BITCHY aka STRONG WALL to the cock... FUCK OFF CHEE BYE... You always disturb my only time with BOYFRIEND without fail... Can't you be AUTOMATIC...???
☠❤Dead Jas❤☠12:10 AM
Monday, December 15, 2008 ❤
15th of December... What really happen to me..?? I found that I no longer eat that much like in the past... When I am hungry I did can eat a lot a lot but now when I am hungry and I only can eat a little then FULL...
I usual can eat finish a packet of noodles when I am hungry but now., I only can eat 3/4 of the food then after that I feel like vomit or disgust by the food that I am eating... What the hell has happen to me??
I now feeling quite not so well and really no mood at all... Because of my damn period... Sianz... I really hope that period can dun affect my mood at all... But really cannot... Sianz...
☠❤Dead Jas❤☠2:18 PM
❤
15th of December... Thinking of what BOYFRIEND is doing right now... I am very sure that she is doing her homework for the work that about our outlet staffs bonus... She really dunno how to fill in... She also felt very stressful about this homework... And she was informed that she need to complete the homework LESS THAN 24 HOURs... That was a really IMPOSSIBLE job for her... I jus dunno why the person, who let her do the homework, give her the paper LAST MINUTE...??
Somehow BOYFRIEND said that the homework is about the performance of us in work... The more I hear from her the more I felt the anger... Because this homework is not for the people who are outlet in charge to do... However, it is more suitable for the AREA MANAGER to do it... Because it is their right to be like a EXAMINER shop around the outlets to observe EVERY STAFFs' actions and attitudes toward the work...
Jus like a teacher observing a student and when the student graduate.., the teacher needs to write a testimonial for the student for his/her performance in class in order to get a BETTER job in future... Not a class monitor writing a testimonial for his/her classmate... Because if the class monitor help her/him to write it, the class monitor might bias to him/her and write a testimonial with FULL of excellent words and praise that person highly...
I also feel angry because I heard from Jurong Point that they received the homework more than 2 weeks ago from their AREA MANAGER and handed up to OFFICE... Yet as for our outlet, receive in the LAST MINUTE... This is really RUSHING for BOYFRIEND to finish the work... I wonder WHY?? Do that person has any purpose by doing this type of actions??
I am SUPER ANGRY that this homework suddenly appeared and needed to be rush to finish by the next day SPOLIT our whole dating time... THANK TO THAT PERSON... Thought that I can have more time to enjoy the FREETIME after work with BOYFRIEND for some shopping...
So finish work at 2pm on 14th of December... Then waited for BOYFRIEND outside outlet... Then accompany her during her break... BOYFRIEND did not eat... So jus shopping around Lot 1... Really happy that BOYFRIEND make me being love by her...
Then next rush down to Basement 1 after BOYFRIEND received a SMS from a person for THAT HOMEWORK... That person handed her the homework then disappear...
BOYFRIEND finished work... Next together, we took cab to Jurong Point to borrow pastries... Then took cab back to Lot 1 again... Then we went to McDonald because BOYFRIEND wan to finish the homework... RUSHING and RUSHING... BOYFRIEND felt so STRESSFUL... My heart feel so pain to see her this way... But I jus sit in front of her and yet cannot do anything at all.. Jus only keep quiet as I can and try not to disturb her... Will talk to her whenever she ask help from me...
When BOYFRIEND almost did finish at about 6.34pm.., she went back to outlet to put back the stationery then took cab together to Jurong Point for shopping with me... We walked around the NEW Jurong Point and look at all the prices of the handphone C905 in all the shops...
Walked passed one of the CAKE restuarant and saw those YUMMY cakes that attracted me... These are kinda of CAKE STANDARD then can attract customers like me... Compare to ***** company... I think ***** company does have a VERY LONG WAY to catch up in order to provide this kinda of STANDARD cake appearance and win their competitiors...
Then at about 7 plus nearly 8pm.., went searching for a suitable restuarant for dinner... Went Pizza hut too much people then walked away... Thinking eating Japanese food at the Basement 1 but all shops are LONG Q... So Forget it.. Went to the NEW Jurong Point and decided to go NEW YORK NEW YORK to eat our dinner...
The place was BIG and really comfortable with the chairs... Ordered the Hawaii Teriyaki Chicken Chop while BOYFRIEND ordered the normal Chicken Chop... Waited for about 10 minutes before the food was served to us... As their business are damn GOOD... Almost FULL HOUSE...
The place was BIG and really comfortable with the chairs... Ordered the Hawaii Teriyaki Chicken Chop while BOYFRIEND ordered the normal Chicken Chop... Waited for about 10 minutes before the food was served to us... As their business are damn GOOD... Almost FULL HOUSE...
The drink of the DAY is Green Apple Cooler...
HAWAII TERIYAKI CHICKEN CHOP
While I was eating, BOYFRIEND busily SMS-ing about work... SEE how BOYFRIEND so hardworking when eating also will not forget about WORK..!!! BOYFRIEND complained to me she can't even really have a good time enjoy eating her dinner... When I almost wan to finish my food, then BOYFRIEND started to eat her food...
After finishing our dinner, we did continued to shop again at the NEW Jurong Point only... Then went to buy the things we NEEDED... After that went back home together... Took bus no. 198 together... And I drop-off first and back home...
I wan to say to BOYFRIEND that "Thank BABY Hubby for accompanying me for the shopping... I do enjoy the time with you... You are my sunshine that brighten my life every single seconds in everyday... I know that you are TIRED and still did not reject my dating... BABY I love you lot and also please do take care of yourself, dun ever get SICK as CHRISTMAS is round the corner... And you do need to WORK hard during CHRISTMAS.."
☠❤Dead Jas❤☠1:40 AM
Sunday, December 14, 2008 ❤
14th of December... Dunno why this period keep falling asleep in bus... Sianz.. Somehow at night I cannot easily get to sleep.. Everytime I keep telling myself RELAX then I can easily fall asleep... Dunno what happen to me...?? I feel like taking sleeping pills...
I am really happy and really enjoy for this week only... Next coming week I really cannot enjoy much.. Meaning of enjoy is spending more time on BOYFRIEND jus the 2 of us most of the time... But next week really cannot... Because even we are together, there will be sure a STRONG wall in between us trying to stop us to get so close... And also I dun even got a chance to talk to BOYFRIEND anymore...
Whenever BOYFRIEND presented, the STRONG wall is SUPER HYPER like hell... Even can like cut into my talking with BOYFRIEND... Then BOYFRIEND can suddenly ignore my talking and start a new convseration with STRONG wall... That make me so so much of HURTs in the HEART... This always happened...
Last time I tried to get near BOYFRIEND... The person (STRONG wall) seem like very unhappy... Sianz sia... Somehow everytime quarrel always will involve the SRTONG wall almost 3/4 of the quarrels... That why I always HATE the STRONG wall so so much like hell...
I got to enjoy my VERY LAST day tomorrow before my happiness period end... And also before BOYFRIEND change back and the spirit gets off from her body again...
I am really happy because I got to repeat the history what happen in the past when we did it after work on the 12th of December... She FINALLY asked me out for supper... SO LONG ago since now.. As usual, went to the coffee shop near Jurong East Entertainment centre there to eat after work...
We ate the same foods that we usually order in the past... But this time I finally order BLACK BLACK carrot cake... I dun care what other people say... My parents always dun allow me to eat BLACK BLACK wan because scared my injuries on my body turned BLACK when it recover... I told BOYFRIEND last time... And happy that BOYFRIEND still remember... She also did tried to stop me from eating it...
Thank for the LOVE, BOYFRIEND~~ I hope that your LOVE will never change... I really dun like to look forward next week... And I hate the working scheme for next week... But I do have no comments... As long as you are happy I will be happy... And PLEASE dun leave me a side for the next week... I HATE IT...
☠❤Dead Jas❤☠1:39 AM
Saturday, December 13, 2008 ❤
13th of December... O.o... I am doin some online shopping during this hour.. Lolzz... It is so LATE... Planning to open an ONLINE business... But now I trying really hard how much do I need to spend for the shipping the stocks from Taiwan to Singapore.. I even try to contact the owner of the stocks in process... I do hope that I can success my dream...
On the 2008-12-11 01:22:26... I message them this...
哈咯。。我是新加坡人。。我对你们的帽子衣服的设计很有兴趣。。也觉得设计的图案很COOL..我想问的是你们以后会想要在新加坡开店吗??
我好想买你们的帽子和衣服,但是没钱到台湾去买。。请问可以和你们网上定购吗?? 然后寄到新加坡吗??
版主回覆: 2008-12-12 17:24:06
我們是網路訂購的,本網站就可購買,但寄到新加坡的運費就由你這邊自己負擔了歐,還請您多多指教歐~謝謝,新加坡開店的話,我們目前還沒計畫但可能會採寄賣的方式,謝謝拉
They say the shipping fee and others will depend on me and I have to take fully responible for all the payments... But problem is How I am goin to pay them through internet... That is a TOUGH question for me...
I do hope that people who are doing this business please share some experience to me... I wan to open mine too... Hee heez.... Got to sleep now... NIGHT people...
☠❤Dead Jas❤☠2:19 AM
Friday, December 12, 2008 ❤
12th of December... Goin to work later afternoon... HATE to work... Jus hate the job... Now planning for my job for future... Opening my very FIRST own business... Trying hard to find informations and also suppliers... Hope I really can successfully fulfill my dream job... Hahazz...
Yup... 11th of December... What I have done for this whole day?? I really have a wonderful, enjoyable, excited and most happiest day for me in my whole entire of life... Hahazz... Though jus for the time when I first met her till now...
So woke up at about 10 plus in the morning and get ready at about 12 plus in the noon then made my way to Jurong East library... Before library, withdrawal some cash for some uses... Then next to the Library...
In the library, it is almost FULL HOUSE... All tables and seats are taken... I walked from 1st storey to 4th storey then from 4th storey to 1st storey again... Findin HIGH and LOW for empty spaces... But in the end.., NOT a single one at all... So decided to go to 3rd storey to wait for BOYFRIEND and her sister... Switch on my laptop and watched the videos from YouTube...
Answered a phone call and down to 1st storey to meet them... Slacked there for a while then up to 2nd storey for playing from the laptop and also helping some stuffs for them.. At about 3 plus, the sky went darker and darker and it started rain HEAVILY... Waited for the rain to become smaller a bit till 4 plus...
Took bus 105 near Jurong East Entertainment Centre to BOYFRIEND's house... At BOYFRIEND's house downstair, collected my photos that I ordered on 10th of December... Then went up to BOYFRIEND's house for a while... Helped BOYFRIEND and her sister with some stuffs...
At about 5 plus nearly 6pm.., BOYFRIEND accompanied me to Orchard... Took bus 111 with her... BOYFRIEND did not seem quite happy however felt SO STRESS... I did had a little hard time to cheer her hard in bus... Trying to make her dun feel stress after answering a phone call from work...
At Orchard, went to Taka first... BOYFRIEND seem a bit ok... Bought some mags... Then went to walk around at the basement 2... Finally HUGGED BOYFRIEND since million years ago... Lolz... Hugged her very tightly... Jus missed the warmth from her body so so so much...
Passby one shop in Taka selling these bears... Those bears are damn cute... How I wish I can have ONE... But I know is impossible... Because one bear really cost a BOMB...
BOYFRIEND again answered the phone call... Talked about work again... BOYFRIEND like more stressful again... Complained again and again... When the time she off, there were always got BIG BIG MAJOR problems happen without fail... Sianz... Looked at her so unhappy like that... So walked to cartoon show performance... Looked and played with all the cartoon toys with BOYFRIEND so to keep BOYFRIEND happy...
Next walked to Far East Plaza... On the way, BOYFRIEND face very BLACK... I did tried so so hard to make BOYFRIEND happy and telling her better dun think too much... And my brain is like telling me that BOYFRIEND should be HAPPY when she is with me... CANNOT show sad or angry face... It is very RARE for me that can go out with me so she must be HAPPY...
So went to a JAPANESE fast food... Ordered Curry Don and Coke as a drink... It only cost me $18.. But it is not wasted at all... Because overall the foods is really damn delicious... Love the curry taste... And also how the packed the food is quite CUTE.. Hahazz... The uniform for the waitress is damn CUTE too... Like a STUDENT wear...
THE CURRY DON which BOYFRIEND and I ate for dinner...
After dinner., into the Far East plaza... Went to find the SHOW shop first... Finally FOUND the shop... OMG... It is damn nice... But all the stocks are in ONE PIECE only... Do you all noe why..?? Because the price for each items is NOT CHEAP AT ALL... One jeans can cost about $168... And is equal to one concert ticket the most FRONT seat wan... OMG...
Next, went to walked Level 2 to Level 4 then back to Level 1 to shop... Supposed plan to buy some clothes but in the end, bought a pair of Boots... Yup my favourite shoes is BOOTs.. Hahazz... I love the boots so much... It cost not so cheap... Should say is AVERAGE price to me...
So time is passing so fast... And late night is COMING so soon... Got to go back home... BOYFRIEND again BUSILY answering calls from work again and again... And when talked, is not jus 5 minutes... However, is 1 hours plus... Sianz... BOYFRIEND looked more stressful again and again...
However, I also felt so DISTURB and ANGER in my body... The ONLY day that she can go out with me and can spend time with me and yet keep kena disturb by calls... Last time also the SAME... Never ever have the private time with BOYFRIEND in our datings from the past till now... Sianz...
BOYFRIEND I do hope that on my birthday.., BETTER dun answer any calls from work again... Because I dun wan to spolit my mood again on my BIG day during my party... PROMISE??
Anyway, I do enjoy the day with BOYFRIEND... Because she helped me to carry things... LOVE HER... Hahazz... This should be the BASIC for BOYFRIEND... And also I do hope that there can be more datings between the 2 of us only if possible can go out on our every monthly anniversary... That is OUR VERY SPECIAL day on each month...
I LOVE YOU MY BABY HUBBY...
Lastly... Thank for BOYFRIEND saying the 3 GOLDEN word to me again... Thank for the 3 words that really LIGHTEN up my whole entire of day... LOVE YOU...
☠❤Dead Jas❤☠1:37 AM
Wednesday, December 10, 2008 ❤
10th of December... Really feeling quite happy today... Today no WORK and so tomorrow too... Today BOYFRIEND said wan to buy handphone... Suppose dun wan to go out but in the end, go out to meet her... BOYFRIEND jus can't wait to get her NEW handphone...
Met her at Jurong East station at 3 plus after her work and together took train to her place there.... Went to her house nearby and order her handphone from the stall... Then went up her house for a little while... Then went for lunchat the nearby coffee shop..
I never eat for morning till 4 plus... Next, walked around for a while... And BOYFRIEND sent me to the bus-stop... Waited for the bus together... Then back home in bus alone to home...
Looking forward for tomorrow... Because will be meeting BOYFRIEND tomorrow at Jurong East Library for some laptop questions... Hahazz... Her sister coming too.. Hope that I can have a WONDERFUL day with BOYFRIEND like in the past... I LOVE HER so much...
☠❤Dead Jas❤☠9:34 PM
Tuesday, December 09, 2008 ❤
9th of December.. BOYFRIEND and I have been together for 9 months and 1 day... Is really LONG period... If we never break once, we might already being together for 1 year and 2 months... But too bad we broke out and after 4 months, patched back again...
BOYFRIEND had been changed quite a lot... And now I tryin to get use to her and try not to quarrel much with her... But dun she know that when I feel so jealous I will like to pick on a quarrel with her... Dunno why... Sianz..
Hope that I can LAST LONG with her... I love the way she treated me today... Made me feel that I am her wifey.. Hahazz..
What happen on 7th of December...?? Finished work at 1.30pm... Then shopped with mother at Lot 1... We ate our lunch at Sakue Sushi... Cost me about 20 plus only for 2 persons.. CHEAP... Lolz.. Then watched the Cartoon performance for 30 minutes... Wah that was really cool performance.. I love the way they sing do attract me a lot a lot... So cute also... After that, look for shoes... Too bad no shoes attract me..
After that, went to IMM... Bought quite a lot of stuffs... Went to Daiso for gloves for my mother working used... Then went to a shoes shop, saw a pair of boots that attract me... Planned to buy but in the end, dun have my size... So sad... Then next went to GIANT.. Bought an toaster oven... I carried it... And round the market of fruits and vegetables...
Next, walked back to Jurong East Station there for POPULAR to buy my photo albums... Bought 2 albums... Because I will be collecting all my photos that I have taken... YAY... FIRST time to have my very own photo albums... LOVE IT... Will taking more photos in future if I am FREE or interest...
Then back home with all the heavy stuffs down from my hands... Tiring and sleepy too... Lolz..
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On the 8th of December which is BABY's and my 9th month anniversary... As usual.., BOYFRIEND does not send any messages... Haiz... Really kinda of disappointed... HURT in my heart...
Woke up at 8 plus in the morning, then out of the house at 10 plus... Took bus 99 to Jurong West st 91 to meet my god brother for breakfast.. Really cannot find the food that I feel like eating... No mood to eat at all... VERY tiring, sleepy and VERY COLD like hell (FREEZING soon)...
So in the end, went to Jurong Point to eat Pizza Hut... Ate a Regular pizza (CURRY CHICKEN), mushroom soup (My favourite) and also 5 pieces of sour and spicy drumlets... Lolz... Really FULL like hell... And in the end, I did not eat anything during DINNER time...
So after Pizza Hut, took cab together with god brother... He gave me money so I no need to pay... He drop off first then me...
Back home for 1 hour... Played some games from my laptop... Then OFF to work... Work was so far OKOK... Have fun chatting with people... Hahazz...
Then work ended, walked off together with BOYFRIEND... Took train together... Lolz... Love her so much... Finally, I hold her hands for so LONG period... And I can rest my head on her shoulder... It was like a MILLION year ago that I have not been doin that... Happily chatting with her...
Then back home by bus alone... Got to separate from her as she took train back home as saving money.. She did changed a lot a lot because she last time will always waste money whenever she got the money... NOW NO!! Good BOYFRIEND...
Anyway, I love the way she treat me today and I do hope that she can treat me like this EVERYDAY not jus 1 DAY... BABY Hubby I LOVE YOU lot...
Got to sleep now... Sweet dream Blog readers...
☠❤Dead Jas❤☠1:32 AM
Monday, December 08, 2008 ❤
Got to sleep now... Will update tomorrow night if I am FREE or awake... My itchiness on my skin is getting more and more worst and I cannot STOP myself from scratching it... ARGH... OMG... Blood coming out everywhere from my INJURIES... FUCK... Yet I dun feel so scared or what.. I feel so shiok to see BLOOD and also let me more HIGH... Sianz...
Anyway GOOD NIGHT...
HAPPY 9TH MONTH ANNIVERSARY to BABY HUBBY & ME...
☠❤Dead Jas❤☠2:34 AM
Friday, December 05, 2008 ❤
5th of December.. BOYFRIEND's and my 9th month Anniversary is coming in 3 days time... Guess what... We are unable to celebrate again because of WORK... Sianz... There goes another anniversary... Haiz...
Christmas is coming really soon in about 20 days time... And I dun have the feeling of Christmas at all... I love Christmas but this time I dun feel the Christmas is coming... I do hope that I even can celebrate Christmas... But I know is that I will be working during Christmas... Haiz...
Guess what... This time Christmas a lot of outlets need people... And most of the staff in working outlet refuse to go other outlet to work and help out... So only me can go... Again... I never ever work at LOT 1 during Christmas ALWAYS... 23th and 24th of December I got to go Jurong Point to help out and 20th to 21th of December maybe I will be goin to IMM to help out... If other people dun wan to go...
I think I have worked all outlets in the WEST... Even one of the drivers said to me that "Why do company treat me like a ball?? Kick here and kick there..." Somemore, asked that I like that worked got any extra pay... If like that NOT WORTH at all... I worked Bukit Panjang, Jurong Point and if IMM is confirmed then I will be goin next week... From all the outlets, give me the worst impression was Bukit Panjang... The outlet incharge staff was nice but I really unhappy one of the staff over there... Because she got a lot of rules that I cannot do...
That time once I remember that I often do the method how I do in Lot 1 and Jurong Point in the outlet... But in the end, kena scolding by that staff... Said what cannot do like this... But if other staffs, that higher position than her, she will listen to the staffs and nicely talk to them... FUCK lor.. I know that I am only a normal sale people and I know she always look down on other people who are in lower position than her...
Even one of my friend that almost the same age as me and worked P***R before also cannot tahan her as she also kena scolding from her too.. Sianz.. I dunno how she can get promoted with this type of attitude in treating other staffs which their position is lower than her...
Sercetly from the past, I jus feel that this company that controlled the outlets are jus so BIAS... Only people who are quite closest to the people who controlled the outlets will easily get PROMOTED... I jus dun like the way of how they promote people... Even you have a CERT, you might not get easily promoted from the company... The CERT jus become SO much USELESS...
Whatever... Haiz.. Christmas really coming... I cannot celebrate with BOYFRIEND so so so much BORING... Jus hope that Christmas on that day I can work with BOYFRIEND..
☠❤Dead Jas❤☠2:02 PM
Thursday, December 04, 2008 ❤
4th of December... Sianz sia... Today goin work later... Dun feel like goin... Think that these leaves are jus too short for me... How I wish it can be a MONTH... >.<... Lolzz... Later work I hate it... I dunno how I goin to face BOYFRIEND... Though I miss her, but I hate to see her as she will hurt my heart once again by her action and everything...
Haiz... I wonder when will BOYFRIEND be like last time treat me like her wife... Now when people ask her "Are you SINGLE?" She will say "YES".. And never say "NO"... If people ask me, I really dunno how to say.. But the biggest chance I will say is "YES", but I dun feel proud at all to say that "YES"... Last time I do feel proud... Because I had a really LOVE and care for me too much BOYFRIEND... SMS me almost the whole entire day to keep me accompany and also even date me out...
When people ask me who is my BOYFRIEND, I really feel so a bit ashamed to say who is my BOYFRIEND... Because I scared that people might know her... As in BOYFRIEND's rules, we can't even hug or hold hands when we are in uniform... At outside near anywhere that her friends working, she also dun wish that me and her too close... Because she dun wn her friends to know that I am her girlfriend... That make me hurt more deeper...
I jus wish to know why BOYFRIEND really scared that her friends to know me... Even I had let my whole group of friends know her... And my friends do hope to see her....
I dunno why our relationship must be hidden... Why can't we be like those normal couple on the street... Is very damn tiring to hide everyone about us... I am tired of hiding it... I dunno how BOYFRIEND feel about it?? How I wish that I can know her heart right now.. But I think is really IMPOSSIBLE..
☠❤Dead Jas❤☠9:43 AM
Wednesday, December 03, 2008 ❤
ARGH... I missing BOYFRIEND right now.. And also damn WORRY about her... Why dun she ever wan to send me a SMS to let me dun be so worry...?? Why do she wan to be like that to me...??
I feel so disturbing to her nowaday... Keep sending sms to her and yet she never reply a single one... My handphone bill also did increase... Sianz...
Why do she wan to treat me this way..?? If other people she will not treat them like this... WHY OH WHY!!?? FUCK sia... Sianz... MILLION SIANz... And tiring... -.-" What the FUCK... Lolz... Haiz...
What am I doing...?? I also dunno... Haiz... Now still waiting for a chance that BOYFRIEND will sms me... I think is jus 0.000001% only... Because I am not the important GIRLFRIEND to her anymore... I think I have to stop myself and stop lie-ing to myself that she still like last time love me very very much... IF continue like this I think I will got into MENTAL HOSITPAL one day in future... Is really true... Last time I almost gone CRAZY because of her...
I think I do need time to think that if this relationship can be really FOREVER.., I really dun wan keep hurting myself... People are RIGHT.. What for if you love a BOY SO hard yet in the end, that BOY really dun care or love you that much.. What WORTH for me to LOVE that BOY MORE...??
People also complain to me that I should give other BOYs, that do LOVE me, a chance to be with me so that I will not be always HURT... I already reject some guys in the past ago... And I do feel so bad... And now I no longer their friends... I lost them as friends... I am sad...
☠❤Dead Jas❤☠11:45 PM
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3rd of December... My last day leave at home... Sianz... Tomorrow goin to work again... Really feel so relaxing to stay at home and also can always wake up late... But start from tomorrow onward, I must wake up early... Sianz... I dun wish to work this type of job... I wish to work in FASHION job instead... Because now my dream is FASHION... I love fashion... Strange style from me... Hahazz...
How I wish I can work in this job... Thinking of opening a online business but problem is that I really dunno how to place an order at the oversea company for stocks... Sianz..
Mmm.. Forget it... Will find out on my own one day... So today I have been staying at home alone again... And This is my very FIRST time to cook my lunch... I do have a FEAR of touching those cooking pot.. I scared is the oil flying all over the place... Because I did got hurt when I am FOUR and I stop getting near from those cooking pot... The scar in my body still can be seem... And never disappear from me FOREVER...
Thinking of my BOYFRIEND right now.. She is now working... MISSING her so so much but scared to see her as she is always being so cold to me.. I really dunno how to face her tomorrow... Sianz... Seeing her is a kind of disappointed to me... Because I do miss last time de her... Last time she always made me happy and often forget my unhappiness but now she really can't do it... SAD... Tell her to hug me is like WANTING HER LIFE... Sianz..
Anyway, I jus hope that BOYFRIEND can get well soon... I still worry about her as she had not telling me how she is now... Haiz...
Once last thing, today is the FIRST day that my godbro goin NS... Sorry that I did not accompany him to go as it is too early and I cannot easily wake up... Thank for leaving me a SMS telling me to goin NS... I hope he can have fun in NS and be THIN and good-looking more when the next time I meet him... Hahazz... JIA YOU...
This is my most favourite bread since very very young.. But the taste a bit changed... Haiz... I miss how the taste of the bread in the past... It tasted so YUMMY and unforgettable...
☠❤Dead Jas❤☠3:23 PM
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Finally watched finish 不良笑花... Really a CUTE and happy ending in the end... But really hope that there is PART 2... Hahazz... I love how the story goes... Really admire the director can think of this type of story... Love it too much...
This is one of the sence in 不良笑花.. Really LOVING couple... BOYFRIEND will not do that to me... Only I do to her... Haha... I do look more like a guy...
Last time all my exs did this to me, so that I felt being LOVED by them and never ever feel so lonely... They really not scared of how people look... They even hug me in the public most of the time... Even we were in SCHOOL UNIFORM... And we did not even feel scared of being complain by the residents around us to our school principal... Oppz... Sorry to compare them to BOYFRIEND... But I am not comparing... I am jus telling the fact... Which BOYFRIEND never did this to their girlfriend??
I think all the BOYFRIENDs in the world will say that they did that before... Hahazz... This is the way to express a LOVE to GIRLFRIENDs... I wish I can have hugs more oftenly from my BOYFRIEND...
☠❤Dead Jas❤☠1:33 AM
