Saturday, April 19, 2008 ❤
19th of April.. I think I have to admit that I am a VERY EMO person... Because I always dun like to talk to people around me and I dun like to smile either... Those smiles that appear from my face I can say that those are fake and devil smiles...
I now then know that I am not a good person because I always think from revenging... After makin people feel bad, my heart will be so happy... I also dunno why did I have this type of devil emotion... I dunno who can change me back...
Now in school, I dun like to talk more things to my friends... Because I jus think that I cannot really communicate with them... Maybe they had know that I am a LES.. That why they scared to get near me... OR I can't even produce a USEFUL idea in group discussion and they think that I am jus being LAZY... Actually, I am not a LAZY person jus that people had said out all my ideas and that why I had nothin to say... I really did use my brain to force myself to think as much as I can but in the end, I really very DISAPPOINTED about myself...
I am the one who always being left behind... People seem like dun like to get near me... People even wan to go home or go to school with me... When I am alone walkin to school or walkin back to Woodland station, my brain was like keep thinkin why do people dun wan to walk with me... AM I A MONSTER to them..??
From my heart that tell me, people from surrounding are not really trustfully people... They can easily betray me.. Those who can be easily trusted are those who are willin help me in showin me some cares like my BOYFRIEND, some aunties in my workplace, my buddies in Poly, Jing Hong and Tim, and also will not forget my DEAREST godsisters, Lee Ling and Yu Ting, and godbrother., Eric, that I knew from Secondary School till now...
I wan to thank you all that willin to care for me when I am damn sad... And also did said some encouraged thing to me when I am in problems... Those smiles that appear right in front of you all only are my REAL smiles and it does come right from my heart... I LOVE YOU ALL GUYs... I will not forget those happy time that we had in the past...
Today was a horrible day... Because BOYFRIEND never come for work and I stayed back to work 8am to 10.30pm... But I did had a great in my workin.. And I still miss my BOYFRIEND so much during work... Mmm... Work not bad hit 3K...
Worked until my legs cannot even walk or stand at all... I jus wan to sit down forever like that... Argh... Hate this type of pain... Dunno what will happen to my leg tomorrow... Tomorrow will be workin not so long hours.. Hee heezz... Hope BOYFRIEND can come for work.. I MISS HER so so much...
☠❤Dead Jas❤☠11:55 PM
