Wednesday, January 07, 2009 ❤
7th of January.... 1 MORE day to 10 month Anniversary to BOYFRIEND and me... BOYFRIEND dun look so interested for the day to come.. That make me feel so much hurt... Think as usual again BOYFRIEND shall never ever SMS me a wishing message to me on the 8th of January... For our whole relationship, she only wished me ONCE that is the 4th month anniversary.. I still REMEMBERED it clearly.. And I dun wish to forget because that is the only time I being quite happy... At least she still remember the DAY!!
Another day has past again... My back there still in pain... Think that I sprain my back... Actually can say is not the whole back... Is jus 1/4 of my back...The upper right hand position which very near to my right hand...
I dun even tell anyone about the pain... Because it is useless to tell everyone yet everyone still even seem to bother to care for me... I prefer to keep it in myself...
Yesterday night before sleep.. Memories flashing in my mind again.... And I cried for afew minutes... I feel so much tired in my journey and I really have no more strength to continue my future... Because everyone jus look at my outside... My outside is so much cold toward other people... But yet inside they never realise that my inside always wish that they can come forward to talk to me...
My brain also keep asking me a question... Is my BOYFRIEND can really be a good husband?? I can't answer this question at a sudden... Even my friends ask me whether I am single I also even can't answer them I do have a BOYFRIEND... Because BOYFRIEND seldom really treat me like her girlfriend...
Whenever I need her, WHERE SHE IS... I need someone to protect me but she even dunno... Not long ago, called BOYFRIEND for a chat... Discussing about chalet during my birthday.. She sounded like not so interested... This chalet I do need someone to help also... And I hope she can help me.. But I was WRONG!! I am hurt terribly from her....
Not like last time, she look forward to book a hotel room when I am willing to ton outside... I think if time still can turn back, I do wish that time can jus stop at that time... Let me have more happiness with her during that time only...
What happen already happen... Jus hope that BOYFRIEND can be like LAST TIME... BOYFRIEND using the different method treating me from other females.... I only can see the LAST TIME BOYFRIEND when she talks to other FEMALES only but not me anymore LONGER... I miss her so much so much...
☠❤Dead Jas❤☠11:01 AM
